9.9: Xavier and Winter, Xavier and College, Xavier and Gifts

Thud.  

   What was that? I glanced up from the computer and, having seen nothing through the frosty window pane, glanced back down. I had to write an essay for a business class I barely understood and didn’t want to take, I was probably looking for a distraction when there wasn’t one.

Thud.

   There it was again. I saved my essay and exited out of the program, before shutting down the computer. I wasn't going to get any work done, might as well conserve electricity. I stood up, shivering slightly; the thermostat had been turned down a few degrees to help the university save money over the break.

Thud.

   I turned my head, just in time to see a snowball hitting the frosty window pane. Who was throwing that? The school was on winter break and the campus was abandoned. Luna had decided to take what little money she had and jet off to Paris, while figuring out whether or not to keep the fetus, Asher decided to go see his parents, Claire was kicked out of study group so I hadn't bothered keeping contact with her, Yasmin and Ross were off at some couples retreat presumably acting like bunnies in bed all day. Delilah and Anderson seemed content and I had tons of work to do, so I decided I'd stay. I glided over to the window, peeking through it. 

   “Who is that?” I mumbled to myself, seeing a man, bundled up in winter gear, standing  in the snow, constructing another snowball. He looked freezing, even in the gear; the wind was blowing rather fiercely, snow was being whipped around the face. I struggled to push the frozen window up, but succeeded. “Hey!” I called out.

   “Phoebe!” The man cried out, smiling and waving. “I’ve been trying to get your attention for the past ten minutes.”

   “Wh- Xavier?” I knew I was sleep deprived, so I could be imaging him, I also knew that I hadn’t made any plans to meet up with him. We'd chatted on the phone every week or so, I knew that he took Anderson to the zoo once a week, most of all I knew that Xavier Tenant was not supposed to be at NDSU. “What are you doing here?” I asked, befuddled, but still glad to see him, the smile that spread across my face showing it. I missed Xavier more then I cared to admit and with my thing with Asher, I was trying to ignore the old feelings that lingered before I left for college.

   “I was- May I come in? It’s three degrees out here.”

   “Oh, yeah, yeah! I’m sorry, sure.” I gushed, rushing to the backdoor to allow him to enter the dorms. “It’s been awhile, a full semester, my first semester, ago.” I smiled, as I rushed him into the kitchen, so he could warm up and I could maybe find him something warm to drink.

   “I haven’t seen you since I helped you move in.” He replied, slipping off his snow covered winter coat. “You know what else I haven't done in so long?”

   “What?” I asked, an even wider smile spreading across my face; Xavier was wonderful, I could confide in him, he could confide in my, he helped me whenever I needed it, and, from what I could tell from the three times a week phone calls I received from Anderson and Delilah, was helping Delilah make sure Anderson was doing all sorts of entertaining things.

   “Hugged you.”

   “Aww.” I blushed, as he pulled me into a hug. “You’re freezing! How long were you outside?”

   “Not long, see I drive up each year to see my parents each year and I thought, hey, Phoebe’s close and since you aren’t going home for the holidays and I... I miss you, Pho. I love Delilah and Hannah and all our friends, but, I can’t talk to them like I can to you.”

   “I... I feel the same.” 

   “Well, er,” I looked up at his face and saw him blushing, as he pulled away, “enough of this sappy stuff! Sorry, so, uh, yeah. I decided to drop bye, I hope that’s okay. I was tossing the snowballs because I couldn’t reach you on your cell and you have to have a student ID to get in the dorms, which I didn’t realize.”

   “Thank you, for coming. How long’s the drive?”

   “About a fifteen hour drive.”

   “And you drive there every year?” I exclaimed. I knew how to drive, I’d just never driven anywhere farther then twenty miles away from Delilah’s apartment.

   “I like getting to travel halfway across the country, see the sites, see the small towns.” He shrugged. 

   “That’s really interesting. Other then Isla Paradiso, LA, and here I haven’t seen or traveled to many places. So, do your parents live in Fargo, Dilworth, Horace, Mapleton, or somewhere?” I asked, listing off the city NDSU was in and a few other relatively close cites. 

   “Not exactly. They’re in Denver.”

   “Colorado! That’s what, ten hours away? Xavier, that’s insane!”

   “Erhm, thirteen, and it wasn’t too far. Not for you.”

   “Thank you.” I simply said, still in shock. He drove an extra half a day just to see me? That was insane... Insanely, generously, sweet of him. “Do you want something to drink? There’s,”
   I began rifling through the fridge and pantry, “water, what looks like water, but I’m fairly certain is vodka, root beer, and prune juice.”

   “Not that those choices don’t sound wonderful, but are there any diners or anything open?”

   “There’s this small place. The food’s terrible, but cheap and it’s probably warmer there then here. Plus they have hot coffee and don’t mind people loitering there.”

   “Sounds good. Honestly, Pho, I don’t care if you take me to a gas station or truck stop for food, as long as I’m with you.” Before I could melt to the ground, he was still as charming as ever, we were both bundled up in our warm, winter clothes, ready to brave the storm for some cruddy coffee with glorious company.

____________________

   “Can you believe I only have three semesters of college left?” I asked Delilah, forcing a smile onto my face.

   “No.” She admitted, standing up from the couch. “This is such a cliche, but it seems like only yesterday you were a nineteen year old telling me you wanted to earn your bachelor’s, now you’re twenty-one.”

   “I know...” I sighed, staring off at the television. “Thanks for putting up with me. And Anderson.”

   “Phoebe, you guys are family, no matter what and I love you and Andy, just like I do any other family member. Now, speaking of Andy, there’s a special exhibit at the aquarium. I swear, all the other six year olds love dump trucks and mud and he’s obsessing over aquatic life. It’s all those zoo trips Xavier took him on.”

   “Have fun.”

   “We will. Are you okay with being left in such a... Fragile state? I texted Xavier to stop by, see you.”

   “Xavier?” I hopefully asked, as I heard Andy bound down the stairs.

   “Phoebe, Delilah, it’s time for the aquarium! Yeah, we gotta go.”

   “Don’t worry, we will.” Delilah smiled. “Don’t forget your jacket, it is November.” She called out to him, before following him out the door. Minutes later, I heard a knock at the door. I presumed they were back for Andy’s jacket, so instead of getting up, I simply said:

   “The door’s unlocked. C’mon.”

   “‘Ello.”

   “Xavier, hey. I didn’t think you’d be here so soon.” I stood up, straightening my crumpled clothing. “You didn’t have to come.”

   “Delilah said you rushed home, you were sad because a friend left to join the military with no notice. I figured that an emergency visit. How are you?”

   “Better. I was in shock.” I wanted to avoid going into details; Asher had decided to end the thing we’d had for nearly two and a half years the night before he had to report to a military base and then be deployed. He hadn’t told me much, his family had financial problems, so he was dropping out of college, and he hadn’t left me with much warning. I’d told him I hated him, that we’d had a friends with benefits relationship that actually worked and he’d ruined it. “I can’t believe you rushed over.”

   “Phoebe, I want you to know that I will always rush over for you, even if it’s the middle of the night, even if there’s a tornado, even if you tell me not to. I’ve been struggling with these feelings for a while, you’re the step-child of Delilah and all, being around you confuses me, it makes me happier, and you’re such a kind, intelligent woman, being you’re friend is one of the best things to happen to me, but- and it took me longer then it should of- now I realize that I don’t just want to be you’re friend.”

   “Really?” Hope gleamed in my eyes, as the feeling of hurt slowly melted away, still lingering. “Xavier, I feel the same, but, but...”

   “But?” Hurt filled his eyes. “I knew it wasn’t a good time, I’m sorry. I just, it took, I mean, I had such a difficult time holding everything in.”

   “No, no, don’t be hurt. I’m the one that should be apologizing. You’re amazing and I want to date you, gawd, I want to date you so bad, but...”

   “College.”

   “Yes!” I shouted, too enthusiastically. I wanted to date Xavier so bad, I cared for him as deeply as he cared for me, but after Asher, even though he never held my heart, I only lust after him, I didn’t love him, it felt too soon. “I have three semesters and...”

   “Then?”

   “Then.” I agreed.

________________

   “Why’d you bring me out here?” I smiled at Xavier, as we stood on the fire escape together.

   “I wanted to give you a present.” He replied.

   “You didn’t!” I giggled, as I looked down at my gorgeous dress that I was wearing to my twenty-third birthday party Delilah had thrown for me. She’d invited her friends, a few of my coworkers from the design firm where I’d been hired at, Ross and Yasmin, who’d recently had a shot gun wedding I’d attended, Yasmin was expecting, even Luna, who’d, after her travels across the globe and the termination of her pregnancy, had decided to start working for a woman’s rights advocacy group, and everyone had shown up.

   “I had to. After that unbelievable gift you’d gotten me for my birthday.”

   “It was nothing.” I shrugged, even though I knew it wasn’t to him. I’d bought him a top of the line computer that was ideal for his programming pursuits.

   “Still, I saw this and it made me think of your eyes. I couldn’t resist.” He pulled out a small box, with a generous sized bow atop it, and handed it to me. I slowly opened it, gasping when I saw the contents. He’d purchased a silver necklace with an emerald and pearl encrusted pendent. “I love it.”

   “Really?”

   “Yes... Remember, when we agreed on then.”

   “Then?”

   “Then. Now. Three semesters.”

   “I’d never forgotten.”

   “It’s then now. I... It may be too early, but I love you. If you’re still, you know, into me, we could...”

   “Phoebe Janes, I will never not be into you.”

   “So you’ll be my boyfriend?” I asked, teasingly, knowing what the answer would be.

   “If you’ll be my girlfriend.”

   “Then I suppose the answer is yes.”

9.8: Breakdowns and Hookups

   I felt a little dazzled about the conversation I'd had with Delilah. Was I coming home for winter break? I was planning on; wasn't that what students usually did? I just needed to swallow my birth control pill, then I'd be off to Asher's dorm. I opened the door, glancing around the dorm curiously; the lights were off and someone was sniffling.

   "Luna?" I asked, cautiously what was going on; she wasn't one to sit in the dark blasting music through her earbuds, ignoring the world.

   "No... Don't." I heard her voice from behind the clothes rack. I flipped on the light, walking around the rack to see her sitting in the worn carpeting, streaks of mascara and eyeliner etched across her cheeks. Had she been crying?

   "What happened?"

   "No-nothing."

   "That's a lie." I snorted, hoping I didn't sound insensitive. I could tell something dragged her through her version of hell and back, saying nothing was just avoiding the issue. "C'mon. I'm not trying to be your friend, I'm being nice, so if you're worried about-"

  "Dammit! I have no friends, way to rub it in." She screamed, burying her face in her hands as she started bawling.

   "I, uh, sorry?' I wanted to help her with whatever she was going through, but at the same time she'd never extended the same courtesy and it was difficult to sympathize with her.

   "Oh... No you aren't. I'm a bitch." What had happened to her? Did some epiphany occur and she just hadn't bothered tweeting, instagraming, or snap chatting it?

   "What happened?"

   "No-nothing."

   "You're curled up on the floor bawling. That is not nothing."

   "I… we only have two days until winter break begins. Oh my gods."

   "What-?"

   "Let me explain!" She snapped, standing up. "Er, sorry. I suck at this whole nice thing."

   "You're telling me."

   "Dammit, stop! Look, everyone hates me."

   "No, no they don't."

   "Yes they freaking do."

   "Why?" I sighed, trying to fake interest. I'd reached out to her many times; she'd never returned the favor, yet suddenly when she needed me, she was okay with my presence. Besides, he was waiting for me and after a stressful week of studying, I needed him and our.... They weren't dates and the name hookup sessions, even if that what they were, didn't sound appealing. Either way, I was horny and she was falling apart.

   "I'm... Don't judge me. Please?" She didn't wait for a reply. "I... I told my dad and he said I'd brought dishonor to the family name, that no one would marry me, that he wasn't going to keep funding my college life if that's what I was doing. And no money meant my sorority friends, or at least I mean I thought they were friends, are all bitches who don't care. They called me a slut, said that's what happens to rich girls who aren't pretty enough, pretty like them, that can convince civil, classy gentleman to be tricked into a marriage."

   "What did you do?"

   "I... I went to a party. Halloween night, it was at a frat, my sorority girls were dressing up as sexy, slutty police department workers, you know cop, robber, secretary, detective. I got really drunk and saw a guy who was dressed up like a construction worker. I don't remember what he looked like, other than the fact that he was mega tanned and had stone abs. I flirted with him a bit, we was chugging beers like nobody's business. I was a cop so I said I needed to arrest him for being too sexy, he smirked and then told me he thought I was hot and wanted to see what was under the uniform and said we could go to one of the community bathrooms, hookup in the shower. And... I mean, we did. I know that we used my handcuffs, but after the scene with the handcuffing and him asking if I was on the pill, I just remember sweatiness and tequila and pumpkin spice Advil."

   "Okay... So, so are... What happened next?"

   "I'm... I checked, I peed on a stick, and I'm, I hate saying it. You know."

   "Pregnant?"

   "Yeah... I wasn't sure if you'd get it. I mean you scream virgin. I don't know what I'll do. I don't remember the guy, my dad cut me off, my friends told me I should have swallowed a Plan B or went to the stock broker's lounge if I banged a man, at least if this had happened to him he'd probably be respectful enough to propose and I'd have money again."

   "What are you going to do?" I said, blushing from her comment; if only she knew what I was going to be doing a bit from now. "I mean, you didn't do this on your own, you need someone to help you; you shouldn't go through it on your own."

   "I... I'm a pre-med major, apparently. I went to class yesterday and we had to do this hint about ethics and lawsuits, you know abortion, doctor assisted suicide. It made me think."

   "That's a-" I cut myself off before I could say first. "Good thing."

   "Yeah. I don't know how I'll pay for next semester."

   "A job?"

   "But if I keep this... This thing. Fetus, I couldn't for long."

   "Luna, I can't tell you what to do. It's your choice; think about it, is there anyone you can talk with? Anyone at all?" I stood up, feeling horrid for her, yet anxious to get to Asher.

   "No. My mom's mega anti-adoption, anti-contraceptive, anti-premarital hookups. She's sided with my dad. I screwed up, now I'm worthless."

   "You're not worthless."

   "But nobody wants me. I thought I was just agreeing for a fun night, not a lifelong commitment, but now..."

   "Sleep on it. Maybe visit the frat or try finding the father. He could support you, maybe help you figure out what's best for you."

   "Best for me?"

   "It's your life." I shrugged. "Do what you want. You have all of winter break, then... Well you'll reach the half way point and things might get a bit, ehem illegal, if you know what I'm saying."

   "I... I'm worn out, Phoebe. I don't know. I just don't know. Is this karma? Why the hell would karma punish a kid by making it me it's mom?"

   "You're not a bad person, you just aren't someone who's kind to people and you don't make the best choices about how to treat others."

  "I'm selfish. I know. God, I expect pity, but... I think I'm going to take a nap, is that alright?"

  "You're asking me- um, yeah. I just was leaving. Sleep tight." I smiled, slowly backing away.

  "Thank you." I heard her whisper, just as I was about to shut the door. 

___________________

    "Don't stop." I moaned, as he nibbled at my ear, pulling at my bra strap as my hands gripped his firm shoulders. My back was pressed against the wall, mule gas were wrapped around his waist. I wanted him, I was stressed about school, I'd be going home soon and I couldn't bare to admit to Delilah that I had a D in mathematics, I needed this physical exertion in order to allow my stress to melt away as we molded together.

   "Say it again." He said in a low, husky voice that drove me insane.

   "Don't stop... Oh! You're stopping... Don't. Don't." His lips had moved south, the last scrap of fabric separating my bare chest from his vision had been tossed aside, now his delicate lips were tickling me, kissing, a sensation I'd never felt before. 

   "My bunk, the student union's couch, your bunk, your desk, your dorm hall's hot tub, the dollar theatre, my van, the floor. the gym shower." He said, naming all the places we'd been a bit... Frisky? Frisky at. "Number ten: the wall."

   "Do it, keep doing it!"I exclaimed, not caring for the sentiment he was going for. Normal there was no foreplay, no romance, no emotional connection, it was just a way of us dealing with our problems. He knew I was stressed about class, I knew that he was stressed about how both his parents, who, at the ages of fifty-nine and sixty-two, both had osteoporosis and worked demanding, difficult, dangerous jobs. 

   "That's the lovely, lovely thing about this."

   "What is this? Study group buddies with benefits?"

   "As good a title as any." He shrugged. "The thing about his is we get to be adventurous. Try things I'm bed that wouldn't work if we had a relationship."

   "We've only done it on a bed twice." I said, moving my hand to the waistband of his boxer's. From the obvious imagery, I could tell he wanted me as bad as I wanted me. Why was he chatting?

   "Yet all the same way." 

   "I am not getting on my knees. I said that the first time, it hasn't changed. Nothing more degrading than a b-"

   "This rant. Again?"

   "Idiot." I spat out, as I wrapped my legs tighter around him, hoping him feeling it against my of would urge him to shut up and continue.

   "Naive."

   "Muscles."

   "Like a machine."

   "Sexy."

   "Damn straight, don't you forget it." I rolled my eyes, thrusting my chest out, as he glanced at it. He shut his mouth, the talking was done and list had taken back over. His nimble fingers were on me once more, I wanted my stress relief. I didn't care for drawn out, romance, I wanted this burst of activity and I hated having to be the one to beg for it.

   "I'm going to explode! C'mon. Hurry up." I felt his fingers on me, saw the two pieces of fabric from him and me tossed aside, then gasped a little when it happened. "Wait! Stop." I clenched my teeth as he pulled away from me, lowering me onto the floor.

   "What?" He softly moaned. "Now were both past the point of no return."    "I didn't take my pill. My roommate's in a tizzy cause she's knocked up, so I hurried up and got out of there as soon as I felt she was stable. I forgot to grab it."

   "I'm out. And fudging horny."

   "I know, but she got knocked up, so that's like a turnoff and a vote no to risking it."

   "Colleges should just put birth control in the water."

   "Tell me about it."

   "What do we do?"

   "Uh... What if," I held up my hands, forming the infamous number. His eyes lite up as he smiled, lowering me to the floor. 

____________________

   "You're working out's paid off." Asher smirked, as I stood up off the floor, his eyes glued to my backside. 

   "Thanks." I said, bending down to pickup my scraps of clothes, hurriedly getting dressed. He stood up, as I struggled to find my top. You know... You could always go get the pill, then come back, maybe, you know." I glanced at him, smirking.

   "C'mon, don't you need a bit of a break to refresh, refuel? And the floor," I looked at it, "is kinda soiled."

   "I know we've already ruined the floor's innocence twice now, I thought maybe you'd wanna try a fw other spots like I promised."

    "I've got my term paper. Besides, I'm not stressed anymore."

    "We could do that together."

    "We're not in study group." I pulled on my top and moved towards the door. 

    "We don't have to be in study group to- never mind." He stood up, slipped into his clothes, kissed me.

    "I think I should go do research. For the paper." I opened the door, stepping into the hallway, hoping no one would notice me. 

    The air was brisk; I hurried to my dorm, as the chilly air nipped at my ears and nose. I loved snow, I loved being able to buy and wear winter clothes, I simply despised the cold, though. I was grateful Delilah resided in LA and not Juan, Alaska or some other northern city.

   The dorm was dark when I stepped inside. I listened carefully for whimpers and tears, but heard none. I hit the light switch, skimming the room just to see a note hastily tacked to the wall. What had Luna gotten herself into?

   "Phoebe, thanks for being a friend when I was such a bitch. I'm sorry. I've got some-" the curse word that began with an S was scribbled out, she'd written crud above. "Crud to figure out. Not sure when I'll be back." The when was written below the other sentences, an arrow pointing to it, like it was an after thought. Did I need to contact someone? Or was I being irrationally worried? Regardless of what I did; I wouldn't be able to concentrate on my essay. Crud... Perhaps I should swallow my pill and head back to Asher's. I was stressed again and he had offered... It was just sex, we were just hookup buddies. Might as well.

9.7: Rooftop Halloween Parties and Tipsy Choices

   "Is that what you're wearing to a Halloween party? An artist costume?" Luna cringed, looking from my toe to my head. "What party are you going to?"
   "One with my study group on some rooftop." I said, glancing down at my paint splattered smock. "Why?"
   "You're outfit is horrendous, this is the one time of the year where you don't have to dress like you're going to a... Nun training school, or whateves?"
   "A nunnery?" I suggested, surprised that  she even knew what the word horrendous meant.
   "I said whateves. In case you were concerning my disinterest for, like, interest, like, stop."
   "I, like, oh my gawd, like, will." I mocked her, rolling my eyes. With her nitpicking over my attire, she reminded me of Delilah, however with her valley girl terminology she reminded me of every stereotypical cruel high school cheerleader, ever.
   "Ugh, I so don't talk like that. Besides, you look ratchet."

   "Thanks, Delilah. You know, for someone who clarifies how we aren't friends every five minutes, you talk to me a whole lot more than what's necessary."
   "Ugh, well, like, you know." She scoffed, rolling here eyes. "S to the ucks for you."
   "I didn't say it was a bad thing."
   "Well, just know that as long as I have to look at you, I'll keep trying to make you look less awful. Right now I want to gouge my eyes out with a plastic spoon."
   "You're so pleasant." I sarcastically replied, wanting to replace the P word with the B one.
   "Just saying. Now let me help ya."
   "Fine." I sighed.
   "Yay!" She squealed, taking my hand leading me to her dresser.
   "If I end up looking like a two dollar hooker, I swear to-"
   "Do I dress like a hooker? Please, you'll be fine." With that, I was whipped into her world of cosmetics and Halloween pageantry, as I was drowned in liquid eyeliner, foundation, glitter, and hairspray.

________________

   "Woah..." Asher said, as I sauntered up the metal stairs, onto the rooftop of the building, feeling a new rush of confidence.
   "Hey, handsome." I smiled, glad that my face paint was hiding my blushing cheeks.
   "You look..."
   "Hot?" I suggested, teasingly; I knew he was attracted to me, I also knew that I wasn't too pretty. I considered myself average.
   "In you're..." He trailed off, looking at my black lace, bikini top that resembled lingerie a bit too much for my liking, but Luna had convinced me to wear it, and a micro mini black lace skirt. My face was painted white, with read lipstick, dramatic eyeliner markings, and a black beret sat perched upon my head- I was a mime. "Costume, yes, you do." I felt him moving closer, as I looked up into his eyes.
   "Why thank you. You look rather handsome, dressed in your swim trunks... I have to say, though, it'd be better if I could see those abs."
   "Why?"

   "They're-" I inhaled, about to say a word I'd never said and truly meant to another man, "Sexy."
   "Safety is sexy, baby doll." He winked.
   "Seriously? Baby doll?" I laughed, feeling his hands on my waist, as I rested mine on his shoulders. I felt his lips come closer to mine, then I slightly parted mine, allowing him to kiss me. I felt the odd churning again, I wanted him, I knew that I had this lust, I was alright with it, I was accepting, yet displaying it in public didn't seem ideal. "Where are the others?"
   "Claire is over there in the shark costume, freaking out because someone brought a keg, Yasmin, in the Indian inspired wrap dress thing, and Ross in the genie outfit, are over there making out."
   "Okay then." I sighed, looking towards the two who looked like they were about to swallow each other. "I was sure that the poll thing was going to be a one time thing."
   "I dunno."
   "Hopefully they won't just-"
   "Yeah." Asher blushed. "That would be awkward."
   "For us or them?"
   "Both. Want a drink?"
   "Oh, sure, please." I watched him saunter over towards the cooler. "Asher!" I exclaimed, gasping as I saw a gaggle of students clustered around a keg, as someone appeared to be doing a handstand on it began chugging the golden liquid.
   "Huh?" He turned.
   "What are they doing?" I gestured, intrigued.
   "A keg stand..." He said, smiling a bit. "Have you never heard of that before?"
   "No. Are they fun?"
   "I mean, the alcoholic beverage part is, but the headstand can be a bit nauseating."
   "I wanna do it."
   "Are you-"
   "C'mon, lift me up!" I took his hand, leading him to a keg.
   Everything occurred so quick, he lifted me up, I felt the blood rush to my head as I chug, chug, chugged, as everyone chanted 'Chug! Chug!'. I felt dizzy, yet exhilarated when he put me down. My first sip of alcohol. My vision blurred slightly, yet it was a happy feeling. This was risky; this was something my parents would from upon me doing in public, yet I had! Why no act on my admirably frownable affections, now? My sense of daringness multiplied by seven, went I sauntered, or, more accurately, tipsily staggered, over to Asher, placed my hands on my shoulders and said:
   "You're hot, so am I. We're fit, we're young, attracted to each other, what the hell, let's do this."
   "Phoebe?" He deviously smiled. "Are you sure." I nodded, as we led each other away from the party to a private area where we could have a little naughty fun.

________________

   "That was something, something else." I murmured, exhausted. "You're, gawd Asher you're insanely wonderful."
   "You're pretty good, too." He stood up, slipping into his shorts. "Just... tell me something, how high is your alcohol tolerance level?"
   "Uh... This is the first time I've drank, so-"
   "Pretty low."
   "But it was just a bit of beer! I'm not even slurring!"
   "So you were thinking straight?"
   "Yes, thank you." I glared at him.
   "I just, why would you sleep with me?"
   "Because you're hot, I'm horny? Look, if you think I'm going to become a clingy girlfriend, no worries. I'm alright with the deal at the gym."
   "Really?" He smiled. "Because I know we can teach each other things- this is going to be fun."
   "Glad you think so." And with that, we decided to part ways, we'd had our fun at the party and now it was time to go about our own business, though I do admit it was rather entertaining replaying the event, thinking of next time.

NOTE: My game's been glitchy and crashing every five minutes, so I apologize for the lack of pictures!

9.6: Lust and Intrigue

NOTE: There are a few references, pixelated Sim nudity, some slight "bad" word usage, you know.

   "Now don't think just because we're roomies we can do sunrise yoga together. The class is strictly for my sorority."

   "All I said was thanks for showing me where the gym was…" I paused, wanting to add how wit technically wasn't her sorority, because he technically wasn't in it, but I refrained. 

   "Well you were thinking it!" She pouted, having to be the one who was correct. I didn't bother informing her that I was not, in fact, obsessed with being her BFF sorority sista, like she seemed to believe. "Now, second floor is yoga and treadmills, first is the desk, just have them scan your student ID- it works like a membership- and a few machines, basement is showers, third is the track. Now leave me alone!"

   "Fine." I grumbled, wandering off to the desk to have my ID scanned. "Good morning." I murmured to the attendant, who was rather thin, tall, with silky black hair down to her tailbone. 

   "Ello, come for a program or just a general workout?"

   "General workout."

   "Alrighty, I'll scan ya in." I must have looked puzzled, because she elaborated. "We keep track off how many people attend each class, or are just going for their own purposes, so that way we know what's popular and what we need more of."

   "That's neat."

   "Yep, is this your first time here?"

    "Yeah, I'm a newbie freshman who wanted to explore the campus." I shrugged. "How long does it take you to memorize it?"

   "Took me until November, but I'm horrid at memorization. This is only the second week of the semester; I'd say another two weeks, you'll have it."

   "Ah, thanks." I smiled, then glanced around at the crowded first floor. I wasn't a gym rat; I hadn't ever used a treadmill or weights machine or elliptical, so if I was going to make a fool of myself, I wanted to do it around the least amount of people possible, therefore I decided to head up to the second floor. 

   I slowly walked up the stairs, glad to see that the second floor was much emptier, provided you disregarded the yoga class. Treadmills didn't seem too difficult to use. Press the on button, pick your elevation, pick your speed, press go. I climbed onto the one closest to me, used the default settings, an began running.

   There was something surreal about  stationary running. You were going so far, yet stayed in the same place. It was a bit like the public education system, you could move ahead, be the best in your class, but unless you were in honors courses or AP, no one cared, you were the best regular kid or the best dumb kid, but you were still with the dumbs and the regulars. My thoughts turned from my school to my brother's.

   Anderson excelled at preschool, according to Delilah. He could already count to twenty-six and name nine colors- black, purple, pink, blue, green, yellow, orange, red, and white. When he was handed the phone, he sang the cleanup song over and over and over, he said he had friends, two to be exact, Celeste and Benedict, and that they painted together. Tomorrow the class was going on their very first field trip, to the zoo. He was enjoying himself and I was thankful for that, we both loved school.

   "This is easy." I murmured to myself, deciding to speed up the machine. I hit the button a few time, feeling the increase. This was fast, maybe a little too- "Gah!" I screeched, my cheeks turned bright crimson. I'd fallen down, luckily nobody seemed to notice, except for the shirtless man in the corner who was snickering. I rolled my eyes, ignoring him, and climbing back onto the treadmill.

   "I hope yore better at maths than you are at exercise." I hear him call out.

   "I'm afraid not." I said. That was an odd statement.

   "That'll mean a lot of work for me." He sighed. 

   "Huh?" I kept jogging, waiting for an explanation.

   "Aren't you Phoebe from the math study group?"

   "Yeah..." How did he know that, we hadn't met yet. "Who are you and how do you know my name?"

   "Asher and I looked at your ID. I remembered your name from the sign up sheet, there was only one spot left and luckily I nabbed it, and figured Phoebe Janes couldn't be that common of a name. Also, we have maths together, along with the rest of study group, which meets tomorrow."

   "You're observant."

   "And you're attractive, lucky for me, so study group should be okay. At least my eyes will have something nice to as I want to stab my brain with a pencil and the overpriced math book."

   "Wait... What? Attractive?" I smiled to myself, not sure I'd fully comprehended the first part of his sentence. 

   "I thought we were stating the obvious." He shrugged. "I'm observant, you're butt's great, we're both bad at math."

   "I…" I wanted to feel offended and joyous at the same time. I'd very rarely received positive statements concerning my body from males, yet I didn't know him. A stranger had been staring at my low back. I turned off the treadmill and climbed off, turning to face him. "I…"

   "I know. I'm so hot I leave the hetero woman, homo men and whoever else is attracted to men speechless."

   "You're not at all vain." I sarcastically replied. He was attractive, his muscles were very defined, he had a cunning grin, and a direct approach that I couldn't determine if I appreciated or not.

   "I'm only like this when I'm trying to pickup woman."

   "You're trying to- me? I-I, sorry. I don't want a boyfriend."

   "And I don't want a girlfriend."

   "But you-" He, Asher, if that was his name, was rather befuddling. "Oh. Friends with benefits? Really? Me? You? Two strangers who just met? Are you really suggesting that?" I tried to sound cool as I blushed, hoping my virginess wasn't obvious. My mind turned to Xavier, he was a kind, sweet man, and I felt a certain degree of caring ness when I was around him, around he man is just met, Asher, there seemed to be this wanting I didn't want to admit existed.

   "Think about it. That's all I'm saying... And not friends, really, study group members, more. The offer's open." 

   "If I every become that type of girl, I'll let you know." He smiled, about to turn around, before I thought of something. "Just because we're in study group you asked?"

   "I picked a study group girl because it was my first time trying I convince a hookup. I figured might as well pick one who cared about we education."

   "Got it…" He left, leaving me pondering the offer. I'd never considered myself to ever, ever do something like that. It would be oddly casual, where was the commitment? The romance? I wanted something grand and glorious, not whatever Asher, from the gym had to offer. I felt an odd feeling, as I glanced at him using the weight machine, sweat glistening off his abs, his rock hard abs, his silken hair, his- Perhaps it wouldn't be so odd; this weird feeling, this overwhelming horny lust, needed to be satisfied.

______________

   "So, are we all here?" A girl wearing glasses asked, I think her name was Yasmin.

   "I think so." A guy, Ross, with ridiculous facial hair replied.

   "Good! I just want to get started." Claire Hannibal exclaimed. Claire was the leader of the group, I decided. She was trying to keep us all together, on track. We'd had our first quiz, an unexpected pop quiz, today and I was feeling rather nervous about it. "So how does everyone feel about the quiz? I think we should cover quadratics and finish the essay about how you solve and graph them together."

   "That was the bulk of the quiz." Asher interjected. "And the quiz was easy. Right, Phoebe?"

   "I…"

   "Ignore her guys, a side effect of y handsomeness is the freshman being speechless."

   "So you two have met, outside of class, I mean?" Yasmin asked. 

   "We chatted a bit, nothing much." I said. "So, first meeting, we only have five people?" I quickly altered the subject, not wanting to linger on the conversation I'd had with Asher.

   "Small's better." Claire said. 

    "That's what she said." Asher muttered.

"You're all freshman, right?" Ross asked. There was a chorus of yeses, which he greeted with a, "Dammit."

   "No foul language in study group!" Claire shrieked.

    "Chill, Clarissa." Yasmin rolled her eyes. 

   "Claire."

   "Sorry, chill Claire."

   "Now, on topic, what do you guys want to cover?" Claire repeated. "I think quadratics-"

   "We heard." Ross said. "I don't even know why I'm here; I was hoping for some older babes, but…" he sighed, looking at the over anxious, overly prepared, overused of day planners Claire, the plump, much more relaxed, glasses wearing Yasmin, and me, the quiet, nervous, blonde who just wanted to pass her math class. "What the hell, might as well stay."

   "Bad word!" Claire squealed.

   "What, hell? No it isn't."

   "Yes it is. Right?" She looked at Asher, Yasmin, and I for confirmation.

   "Dunno." I shrugged.

   "I agree with Phoebe." Yasmin said.

   "Hell, hell, H-E-double hockey sticks, hell." Asher shouted. "Everyone still alive?"

   "Wha-you-I-rules!" Claire, flustered couldn't complete her sentence. "We need to get things done."

   "I think we established that we can say hell without the world imploding. That's something." Yasmin interjected. 

   "Well, I have to get good grades! I'm not sure about you, but I like my full ride scholarship. Maybe you guys can afford to go to college and good off, but I care."

   "I care!" I glared at her; how dare she assume I didn't, just because we wanted I good of a bit.

   "Well, Phoebe, I wasn't talking to you, I was talking to Asher. I know his parents are dirt poor and he's only here because of a scholarship and his parents had to work two jobs each to fee him. He should care… Or maybe he doesn't give a hoot about his parents." Asher paled an called his fist. He looked like he wanted to explode, but he didn't, instead he calmly stood up, gathered up his belongings, and looked her dead in the eyes.

   "My family's financial situation isn't your business. Now, I have class to go to, isn't you, Yasmin, Phoebe, and Ross, as well?" We all nodded and stood up, leaving Claire sputtering behind.

   "Who is that girl?" I asked, once we were out of the library and standing by the fountain. 

   "My dad is friends with her's, so we kinda grew up around each other. She's an overthinking, filterless person, but not a bad person. She just thinks belittling people will make them do what she wants."

   "Phft." Yasmin snorted. "This time it obviously didn't. Now I dunno about you guys, but I don't have any classes, wanna go do something? Go study someplace else?"

   "Sure. Minus the study part." Ross said.

   "We could go to the pool. Skinny dipping is always entertaining." Asher smirked, glancing at me. "What?"

   "The pool's closed. And really? Skinny dipping? Are you that desperate to see me naked?"

   "You're attractive." He answered, not denying, or explicitly confirming anything.

   "I…" I blushed once more.

   "I vote we go to the pool." Ross interrupted. 

   "Might as well." Yasmin shrugged.

______________

   "The pool is closed." I sighed, as Yasmin, Asher, and Ross stood befuddled, looking at the no trespassing sign. "Remember? I said that."

   "Eh." Yasmin shrugged. "It's only closed so the college has their butts covered in case someone drowns without the lifeguard on duty." 

   "I vote we swim anyway." Ross said. 

   "Alright, if you can find a way in." I gestured to the brick wall, feeling butterflies in the pit of my stomach. I'd never gone skinny dipping, not had I ever seen another person without clothes on. I wanted to be spontaneous and take chances, but at the same time, I'd have a fairly modest, if not borderline conservative, upbringing.

   "Hey look at that gate!" Asher exclaimed, pointing at the rusty metal gate, that was locked. "Bet I can jump it."

   "I know I can." Ross puffed out his chest, as if to prove he wasn't bluffing. He stood back a little and began running, barely able to jump it, even though it wasn't that high. "See?"

   "Unlock it." I asked, as he complied. The three of us who hadn't jumped filed in after him, as he stripped, leaving his clothes in a pile, before shouting cannonball and jumping into the water. I tried to avoid looking at his, ehem, lower parts, but I caught a glance, feeling my face flush. The first time I'd seen the thing outside of a  textbook in sex ed. Asher followed suit, as Yasmin stood, looking from him to Ross.

   "I think I'm going to hookup with Ross."

   "What?!" I exclaimed, looking at her, as she pulled off her sweater.

   "He's got that new age, skater boy, hot thing going on. It's appealing. Now are you going to strip or what? C'mon, have fun, let loose." She smiled, as she climbed into water, baring all.

   I looked down at my feet, Asher's clothes were to my left. Hm... This would be spontaneous. I discreetly bent down, picking them up, then I began walking towards the archway that led to the showers and vending machines.

   "Hey! Phoebe's got my clothes." I heard him yell, as I took off running. I heard him running after me, streaking. I glanced back and started laughing; he was hot and he was hilarious, trying to catch me. I stopped once I'd reached the building and smiled, triumphantly, as I dropped his clothes onto the floor.

   "Is this part of your plan to separate me from the group and seduce me?" He asked, raising an eyebrow. "Because if so, kudos."

   "It isn't." I smirked. "But I though about your deal and, I suppose maybe-"

   "Ohhhh! Babbbyy!" A groan from the pool interrupted me. 

   "Are Yasmin and Ross-?" I began to ask, glad when Asher interrupted me so I didn't have to finish.

   "It appears so."

   "I'm going to c-"

   "Oh gawd." I rolled my eyes, feeling embarrassed for the two of them. 

   "So..." Asher paused, looking me in the eye. "What were you going to say?"

   "I, I, nothing." I was going to tell him how I was a hormonal, virgin mess who wanted to let loose and maybe hookup with a stranger, however after the groans from my other study group members, I didn't feel like proposing we do such a thing in such a public place. Perhaps later; there would always be later, wouldn't there be? "Just, uh, I think, maybe I am, you know, that type of girl."

   "Really?" His face lite up, then he quickly tried to act nonchalant. "Alright, cool. Also, I'm sorry if I came off as a jerk at the gym. Afterwards, I realized how rude the whole encounter must have seemed."

   "Don't worry." I smiled, glancing at my feet, my eyes straying towards him. Apparently I'd gotten his hopes up. "Er, I think I should go."

   "Study group tomorrow?" 

   "Sure." I shrugged, keeping my gaze upwards, towards the very fascinating signage that stated the rules. "Goodbye." Was I in lust or just excitement from this new sensation? Was it Asher or just the fact a guy was interested? Thoughts swirled through my mind, as I walked away towards my dorm... I had wanted to let loose at college, forget about the past for a bit...