Alani's POV...
"Kayleigh!" I called out. As her mother, you'd think I could figure out what was wrong with her. She was moping around the house in old sweats, eating ice cream, and watching romantic movies she normally hated. I'd say it was that time of the month, only she told me it was. Normally, she'd blush and never admit that it happened to her. So obviously she's lying to cover something else up.
"Go away." She moaned. "I'm sleeping."
"Kayleigh." I repeated. She wasn't going to sit and be like this. It had been twelve days of this moping; we were going to get to the bottom of this. I missed my happy daughter. I missed her smiling and laughing and joking. She was a seventeen year old girl, I understood this. But it was unhealthy to be like this, I needed to chat with her.
"Moooom."
"Come on honey, let's chat."
"No... and turn the light off. It's blinding me."
"You've missed almost two weeks of school. You're going Monday."
"What day is it?"
"Saturday."
"See... time passes so quickly. What's the point of me getting up, if in ten hours I'll just have to go back to sleep?"
"You're a pretty, young girl. You need to have a social life."
"I talk to you and dad."
"Screaming at us to bring you food or go away doesn't count." I took her hand and pulled her up, off the bed. I lead her over to the couch and sat down. She sat down on the other side. "Spill."
"Huh?"
"You're upset. I know this, your father knows this."
"Period."
"Doesn't last two weeks."
"Ugh. Mooom. Gee."
"Look, somethings wrong. Please, sweetie. I want to help. I want to make it all better."
"No, you can't."
"What do you mean?" Of course I could help. I was her mother. I would do anything for my little girl to make her smile, including kicking some random person's butt. Nobody messes with my daughter and gets away with it.
"Look, there was this person... and I like-" She paused. "I don't know. I kinda think I still like them, but they don't like me. At least, not how I want them to. I told them how I feel and they hate me now."
"Look honey, guys," I paused she didn't say it was a guy. Was this what it was about? Oh my gosh. I would love her no matter what, but maybe that's why she didn't want to go back to school, because she revealed something personal and now everyone makes fun of her, when they have no right. "Or girls, are idiots in high school." I waited to see her facial expression.
"Mom, it was a guy."
"Okay, honey. I just wanted you to know that I would love and support you no matter what. You're my daughter and I'll love you through the good and bad. You'll always be Kayleigh."
"Thanks... that was sweet."
"You know, high school guys mature eventually."
"When? By the time they're thirty-five." She rolled her eyes. "Cause I don't think so."
"Don't worry, he's probably all hormonal and doesn't realize what a catch you are."
"You wouldn't understand."
"I think I would. Come downstairs with me."
"I'm tired."
"I want to show you something... prove I understand."
"Look, I've probably gained ten pounds from the ice cream and candy you guys bought me. I'm good." She laughed, pinching her belly.
"You look amazing, now come on. Scoot ya boot to the living room."
"Fine... but if it's food, I'm not hungry, I want to nap."
"You'll love it."
"I..." She let out a sigh. "Fine, let's go." She stood up and quickly followed her. I was excited to see her face. She would love her surprise, because it wasn't food. It was better. So much better. "Is that-?!" She gasped, as soon as she stepped downstairs. "Mom?"
"Honey, I would like you to meet Booker Singleton!"
"How? I mean... I'm in sweats and an old tank top. I haven't showered in four days. Mom!"
"Kayleigh, darling. I knew about Booker."
"But-but. H-how? He was my secret."
"Well, I think I should leave the explanation up to Booker." I turned to face him, waiting for him to spill. He should be happy that I worked evenings and that Trevor was currently saving lives by putting one flame out at a time. If Trevor was the one to deal with him... things would have ended with a fist fight or something of the sort.
"Tell me! C'mon, please." Kayleigh lifted an eyebrow, clearly frustrated.
"Alright." Booker let out a sigh. "I work for the government. I'm a politician, right? Everything starts out innocent enough, I'm visiting my brother and I see you. My brother... he was sick of living. I couldn't deal with the fact that I just lost him and maybe someone was about to lose their sister or cousin or daughter or friend. I had to save you, so I did. We talked, chatted really.You know all this." Kayleigh nodded. "What you don't know is that afterwards," He took a deep breath. I looked at my daughter, knowing she would dislike what was about to happen next. "I went to my office. I recognized the name Janes."
"What? How?" Kayleigh glanced at me. I shrugged; I knew what happened, but I was unsure of the exact details.
"Payroll. I did payroll when I first started. I kept track of who the city payed. Your dad, a fireman was on the list. I didn't realize it at first, since I had moved up, but I poked around and found out about him. I met him and told him what happened. When I agreed to meet you again... he wasn't happy about it. That's when your mother showed up at the meeting."
"Mom?"
"Honey, I knew you. You would internalize everything if we didn't let you talk to Booker. He told us about the I love you...I knew that had to stop. We had to tell you that we knew and bring him here for you to...you to see him."
"So... it was a fraud? You didn't care for me at all!" She screamed at him, her eyes on fire.
"Kayleigh, that isn't true. If I didn't care for you, why the hell would I take the time to meet you every night? You're seventeen. A kid. I want you to be healthy, but dammit I'm not going to do this like- like I'm your father. I'm not taking the blame. Look, I swear that you're something special. I know that. You know that. hell, everyone you meet should know that or they're blind or an idiot. A complete and utter fool."
"If I'm special, why did you refuse to see me when I said I love you. Cause I do... but that doesn't mean..."
"You're seventeen!" He shouted. I wanted to step in, but it wasn't my place. I wanted to hold Kayleigh's hand and comfort her, but she couldn't like this man who was twice her age. "You are a great girl, great kid. But you are a kid. Okay?"
"Come to my birthday party. Please." She blurted out. "I mean, if you want to..."
"Okay." He took a deep breath. "Are you alright? Do you undertsand?"
"I do...I mean, I don't want to. But I do. I hate being seventeen."
"No, no. You shouldn't."
"Booker, could we ever...?"
"Not now, kid. Don't think of this. Not now." My baby girl wanted to grow up so badly. So badly, it would almost kill her.
Tuesday, December 31, 2013
Saturday, December 21, 2013
6.1: Meeting Up
I took a deep breath, stepping into the quiet structure. The butterflies that tormented my stomach were especially fluttery today. I couldn't blame them, I was going to meet Booker. Booker Singleton... I hoped he showed up to the meeting tonight. I was always a wreck, worried he wouldn't show, even though this was the seventeenth time we agreed to have a chat. I'd recovered. Meeting with the man was like a slightly messed up therapy session. Of course, he insisted I drag my parents along so that way they knew what was going on between us. He was worried that my parents would think something was going on that shouldn't be.
Nothing was, sadly. It was only sad because Booker was... he was attractive. I would admit that this much was true. Especially for someone old enough to be my father. The butterflies in my stomach increased, as I thought of him. I didn't have a crush on him. That would be silly. Besides, he felt... protective towards me. More like I was a lost puppy in the rain and he was giving me a place to stay until I was well enough to be on my way. Thirteen days until my eighteenth birthday. I was legal then. My little... well, I wasn't sure how to label it. My attraction towards Booker was only one sided. I'm sure he viewed me like a sister...or a daughter.
My heart began pumping faster, when I saw him standing there. He was cute, but I liked him just like you liked a famous movie star. You idolized them, you thought they were the hottest guy on the planet, but you knew in reality you two would never be together. That was how I felt towards Booker. It wasn't that I wanted to have some scandalous relationship, I just liked that we had this friend-friend sister-mentor relationship thingie going on.
"Um, hey Booker." The butterflies slowly decreased. I was relaxed; I knew what was coming next.
"Hey, Kayleigh." He smiled, looking up from his book. "Want to sit?" He gestured to the lounge chair on the right of him.
"Sure, yeah." I sat, waiting for him to begin the conversation, like he always did.
"How was your day?"
"No bad. I mean, it was okay... Grace and the cheer bitches teased me about my outfit, but I overheard one of the minions whispering to the other minion about how cool she thought it was. That's something, I guess. I scored a B on my French Lit final."
"French Lit?"
"Really fun class. We have this girl who's from France and speaks the language and everything. It's interesting. Oh and since this is the first time our school's offered the class, they do nineteenth century the first half of the year and twentieth the second. There's a few modern-er books we get to read."
"How do you feel?"
"About French Lit? Uh... I like the class. I scored third highest in the class on the exam, so that's good... I'm also taking French class, so it's cool to learn the history behind the novels and read everything, along with learn the language."
"That's nice." He laughed. "But I meant in a more general sense, not about your school."
"Oh." I blushed. "Well.... kinda happy. I really like getting to talk to you."
"You do?" He appeared flattered. "You know, your parents should come along whenever they want to."
"Yeah, they're just... busy. Since Connie moved out and after I started high school, Mom started working as a cook at a restaurant. She likes having something to do and dad's like top firefighter."
"What career would you like to pursue?"
"Me? I kinda wanted to open my own home daycare."
"Daycare?"
"See, I like working with little kids. They're really sweet and don't back talk and they giggle and smile... they need you. It's like, if I ever got to the point I was a couple weeks ago, if I babysat or had a daycare, someone would need me. Those parents, those toddlers. And, I can indirectly effect a toddler's life. Teach him or her her ABCs, something the single mommy or daddy left up to the school system, and suddenly this kid has potential. I know it doesn't work exactly like that, but I want to make a difference. Children are our future, so why not take care of them?" I said everything in one big breath, hoping he understood me.
"That's great Kayleigh. Truly inspiring."
"Thanks. My sister loved babies and so do I, so I think it's a family thing."
"Connie, she's your sister?"
"Yeah. She stars in the one romcom that's comingg gout soon."
"I may just have to treat the Janes family to tickets." Janes family. That meant me! And my parents... but me, too!
"You? Nah, if anything we should buy you a ticket. You've been so nice and sweet to me..."
"Kayleigh, I just wanted to help. I saw you there, that's all. Could have been anyone."
"But it wasn't. It was you. And I'm really grateful."
"You're welcome. But I should be thanking you."
"Why?"
"I'm a politician. I work at city hall and I play dirty sometimes and... I'm not who you think I am. You help me see the good in the world." Not who I think he is? That's crazy talk, I know exactly who he is.
"I do? Really, you aren't just saying something like that to make me blush?"
"No, I'm honestly thankful."
"I like you."
"I like you, too. You're a nice kid." Kid? Kid? I wasn't a kid. I was almost legal.
"I love you." I blurted out before I could stop myself. I glanced at Booker's face. His eyes were wide, his jaw moving, but no sound came out.
"I-I... I'm sorry. I ju-s-st. No. We have to stop these meeting. I-I... I'm not. I didn't mean to. 'm sorry. I..." He kept stuttering on, as I tried to keep from crying. Stop these meetings? But... I needed him. Them.
"I didn't mean it like love you, love you. I meant like a brother or uncle or something. I, please. Don't stop the meetings. I really need them."
"We can't. No, no, no. We can't. Your a minor, I shouldn't have tried and done this... Kayleigh, I'm sorry. It would probably be best if we never talked again. I didn't think this would happen. I thought.... look, nothing... it's just..."
"Good bye, Booker." I said, slowly. I stood up, walking slowly to the door. He didn't want to see me again? Talk to me again? Why? I didn't love him. Not like love, love him. I loved his personality and was grateful... I didn't mean... damn.
Right foot, left foot. Right, left, right, left, right, left. Keep going. Just keep moving. You'll be home. I would have gone to the graveyard, but if I did I might prove Booker right... and have wasted his time. No, I was going home. I would throw myself on my bed and cry and change into sweats and convince mom I was on my period and that I was too sick to go to school. I didn't want Booker as a boyfriend... he overreacted. A romantic comedy would be a nice cure... funny and sweet and cheesy. Mom and dad will both go to work tomorrow and I'll be at home binging on old movies on Netflix and probably buy enough ice cream to single handily support Ben & Jerry's for the next thirty years.
I said I love you. It wasn't my fault Booker said what he said. How did I feel? Sad. Upset. Like my pet shrew just died. Like I was repeating the questions Booker asked me when we met up. Well, Mr. Singleton, I don't need you to ask me questions. Yeah, I can do it on my own. Totally. I'm not in denial. Denial? Nope, not here. I'm fine. Really. Mr. Singleton, you'll be the wreck. Cause Kayleigh Janes doesn't care. She's fine. Hell, great. I took a deep breath. No, I wasn't fine... but nobody else knew that. Just me and myself.
Nothing was, sadly. It was only sad because Booker was... he was attractive. I would admit that this much was true. Especially for someone old enough to be my father. The butterflies in my stomach increased, as I thought of him. I didn't have a crush on him. That would be silly. Besides, he felt... protective towards me. More like I was a lost puppy in the rain and he was giving me a place to stay until I was well enough to be on my way. Thirteen days until my eighteenth birthday. I was legal then. My little... well, I wasn't sure how to label it. My attraction towards Booker was only one sided. I'm sure he viewed me like a sister...or a daughter.
My heart began pumping faster, when I saw him standing there. He was cute, but I liked him just like you liked a famous movie star. You idolized them, you thought they were the hottest guy on the planet, but you knew in reality you two would never be together. That was how I felt towards Booker. It wasn't that I wanted to have some scandalous relationship, I just liked that we had this friend-friend sister-mentor relationship thingie going on.
"Um, hey Booker." The butterflies slowly decreased. I was relaxed; I knew what was coming next.
"Hey, Kayleigh." He smiled, looking up from his book. "Want to sit?" He gestured to the lounge chair on the right of him.
"Sure, yeah." I sat, waiting for him to begin the conversation, like he always did.
"How was your day?"
"No bad. I mean, it was okay... Grace and the cheer bitches teased me about my outfit, but I overheard one of the minions whispering to the other minion about how cool she thought it was. That's something, I guess. I scored a B on my French Lit final."
"French Lit?"
"Really fun class. We have this girl who's from France and speaks the language and everything. It's interesting. Oh and since this is the first time our school's offered the class, they do nineteenth century the first half of the year and twentieth the second. There's a few modern-er books we get to read."
"How do you feel?"
"About French Lit? Uh... I like the class. I scored third highest in the class on the exam, so that's good... I'm also taking French class, so it's cool to learn the history behind the novels and read everything, along with learn the language."
"That's nice." He laughed. "But I meant in a more general sense, not about your school."
"Oh." I blushed. "Well.... kinda happy. I really like getting to talk to you."
"You do?" He appeared flattered. "You know, your parents should come along whenever they want to."
"Yeah, they're just... busy. Since Connie moved out and after I started high school, Mom started working as a cook at a restaurant. She likes having something to do and dad's like top firefighter."
"What career would you like to pursue?"
"Me? I kinda wanted to open my own home daycare."
"Daycare?"
"See, I like working with little kids. They're really sweet and don't back talk and they giggle and smile... they need you. It's like, if I ever got to the point I was a couple weeks ago, if I babysat or had a daycare, someone would need me. Those parents, those toddlers. And, I can indirectly effect a toddler's life. Teach him or her her ABCs, something the single mommy or daddy left up to the school system, and suddenly this kid has potential. I know it doesn't work exactly like that, but I want to make a difference. Children are our future, so why not take care of them?" I said everything in one big breath, hoping he understood me.
"That's great Kayleigh. Truly inspiring."
"Thanks. My sister loved babies and so do I, so I think it's a family thing."
"Connie, she's your sister?"
"Yeah. She stars in the one romcom that's comingg gout soon."
"I may just have to treat the Janes family to tickets." Janes family. That meant me! And my parents... but me, too!
"You? Nah, if anything we should buy you a ticket. You've been so nice and sweet to me..."
"Kayleigh, I just wanted to help. I saw you there, that's all. Could have been anyone."
"But it wasn't. It was you. And I'm really grateful."
"You're welcome. But I should be thanking you."
"Why?"
"I'm a politician. I work at city hall and I play dirty sometimes and... I'm not who you think I am. You help me see the good in the world." Not who I think he is? That's crazy talk, I know exactly who he is.
"I do? Really, you aren't just saying something like that to make me blush?"
"No, I'm honestly thankful."
"I like you."
"I like you, too. You're a nice kid." Kid? Kid? I wasn't a kid. I was almost legal.
"I love you." I blurted out before I could stop myself. I glanced at Booker's face. His eyes were wide, his jaw moving, but no sound came out.
"I-I... I'm sorry. I ju-s-st. No. We have to stop these meeting. I-I... I'm not. I didn't mean to. 'm sorry. I..." He kept stuttering on, as I tried to keep from crying. Stop these meetings? But... I needed him. Them.
"I didn't mean it like love you, love you. I meant like a brother or uncle or something. I, please. Don't stop the meetings. I really need them."
"We can't. No, no, no. We can't. Your a minor, I shouldn't have tried and done this... Kayleigh, I'm sorry. It would probably be best if we never talked again. I didn't think this would happen. I thought.... look, nothing... it's just..."
"Good bye, Booker." I said, slowly. I stood up, walking slowly to the door. He didn't want to see me again? Talk to me again? Why? I didn't love him. Not like love, love him. I loved his personality and was grateful... I didn't mean... damn.
Right foot, left foot. Right, left, right, left, right, left. Keep going. Just keep moving. You'll be home. I would have gone to the graveyard, but if I did I might prove Booker right... and have wasted his time. No, I was going home. I would throw myself on my bed and cry and change into sweats and convince mom I was on my period and that I was too sick to go to school. I didn't want Booker as a boyfriend... he overreacted. A romantic comedy would be a nice cure... funny and sweet and cheesy. Mom and dad will both go to work tomorrow and I'll be at home binging on old movies on Netflix and probably buy enough ice cream to single handily support Ben & Jerry's for the next thirty years.
I said I love you. It wasn't my fault Booker said what he said. How did I feel? Sad. Upset. Like my pet shrew just died. Like I was repeating the questions Booker asked me when we met up. Well, Mr. Singleton, I don't need you to ask me questions. Yeah, I can do it on my own. Totally. I'm not in denial. Denial? Nope, not here. I'm fine. Really. Mr. Singleton, you'll be the wreck. Cause Kayleigh Janes doesn't care. She's fine. Hell, great. I took a deep breath. No, I wasn't fine... but nobody else knew that. Just me and myself.
Friday, December 20, 2013
6.0: Bullied
There's some suggestive stuff in here, maybe like PG-13 stuff? Anyway, read with caution.
"Oh my gawd! Look at Kayleigh. Seriously, look at her. Did she switch bodies with a twin brother or something? Because she looks like a guy. And uh, loser alert. Does she think she's being sexy in that swimsuit? You know, she looks like a ten year old boy. Chubby, friendless, and flat as a board." Grace shouted insults at me, as I swam to the ladder on the side of the pool. Once a week in gym class, we would use the pool and swim laps or something. This gave the trifecta of bitchdom, the three most popular girls in our school who happen to get to shake their pompoms in mini skirt, making all the guys drool, also teased me. I hated them. For four years since high school began, I was their target. Thank goodness their was only two more months of high school left.
"Oh my gawd! Did she stain her swimsuit? Is that red?" A minion of Grace's asked.
"It totally is! Look, the ten year old boy's got his first period." I held back the tears. For one, my period ended last week. The cheer bitches were messing with me. Two, I started my period in fifth grade. I know for a fact that Grace's first one was during the freshman picnic.
"Look," I felt the tears coming. I didn't have an insult to throw at them and I was about to bawl my eyes out. Perfect. I ran to the changing rooms, hurling my self into a stall. My backpack sat at my feet, with my dress sticking out of it.
I hated this. I hated having to show up at school everyday and be teased for something I couldn't help. My boobs were tiny and I haven't had my first kiss. Great. Why did that make me the target of everyone's insults? I hated my life. My parents didn't know and what would they do? Seriously. Tell our ancient guidance consular? I can't take this through... I needed. I know what I needed. I slipped my dress over my head, ready to open the stall door, when I heard voices.
"Can you believe she actually cried?" Grace and her minions. My life was about to get a hell of a lot worse. Grace was the ring leader in a pink cheer leading outfit she always wore and the other two? Nobody knew who they were, but if you messed with them you'd have trouble starting with a G and ending in a R-A-C-E.
"Look, she's a baby. She got mommy and daddy and is such a stuck up bitch. She doesn't talk to anyone, like she's better than us. She hardly even looks at anyone."
"Did you hear the news? That her sister was, like, with another mom? A drug addict.Yeah, the dad cheated or something. I know her family's messed up, but really? Like, if you're gonna to cheat at least get someone who's hot and not just a junkie and a gold digger." Dad never cheated! Connie was before he met my mom and...
"I bet Kayleigh's on something."
"What, diet pills? Her thighs touch. Clearly fatties need it." I wasn't fat. I was perfectly healthy, in fact I was on the lower side of the scale. Ten pounds from underweight. I couldn't eat during school, or I might have to sit in the cafeteria with them, so I skipped lunch and hung out in the library. If you're going to talk about someone's weight, know the damn facts. Know the truth. They obviously didn't. I refrained from letting out a sniffle; my tears were pouring dow
n now.
"Look, girls. She needs to be taken down a peg."
"Totally, Grace."
"You're right, Grace."
"Here's what we'll do. Invite her to a and invite all the popular guys. Guys, befriend her and then go shopping and get her to wear something super slutty. Like, she dresses like a nun know. Seriously, she could dress better." I was seventeen, turning eighteen in a month. One month until I'm an adult, two months until I graduate high school. I don't need to be showing off my chest and butt to every guy in school, unlike Grace. "At the party, spill something on her. Like, buy a white dress for her than spill beer or something. Make sure that she drinks something before though and is kinda hazy. And no underwear, go it? Convince her to. Have some guy, like, shout stuff at her and we'll convince her to streak. Take pics and distribute around the school." Those... I hated my life. This is what they did in their free times? Plan to embarrass me and hurt my reputation? They didn't even have a good plan.
"My boyfriend's here, let's go."
"Ugh, you'll never let me live it down that I'm single and you're not."
"Well, if you didn't wanna stay a virgin until marriage, I might get you a guy."
"Please and be known as a slut? Ugh, not happening. Wait, does, you know, on my knees count?"
"Uh, yeah! Oh my gawd, what happened!?" I heard shrieks.
"Well,-" They exited the room, so I couldn't here the story.
This is what my life was going to be for the next two months? I couldn't take it. I exited the stall, running to hail a cab. I knew where I was going. It would be ironic, wouldn't it? Me visiting a graveyard. I bet the cheerleaders could laugh later. After all, they do think my life is a joke. I stepped into the graveyard, an icy chill shot through my veins. This was a bad idea. But I couldn't live like this. I hated my life. It would be better if I just... I slowly walked to the pond.
"Why?" A simple question. I had no answer. It might pain them, my parent, but all would be well. All would end well. I couldn't do this another minute. I took a deep breath. The moon shone bright, off the pond. It was a beautiful sight. Peaceful. I would hate to disturb it. I didn't want to go like this, the way of a coward. I had to, though. See, they hated me. If I were to go to that school, they would figuratively make me do it. Why not literally? It would be better... a rash choice, yeas. But better. I wouldn't be in the pain I was now.
The pond was a nice place to end. I wonder if anyone else had the same thought? Thought it was ironic. It was. They shouldn't have a pond in a place like this. Not when the grief over ran you. I set my backpack against a fence side. No note. It wouldn't be anything I could describe in words. I love you. I could write that. But it might be too painful for my mother to read, over and over and over again. My father was strong. He would help her.
I picked up the painkillers. Enough would knock me out. I wouldn't feel the end, the water rushing around me. Filling my lungs until they popped. None of that. I didn't know how it ended. The water doesn't let you get oxygen? That was probably something. I didn't have time to study it. I tilt my head back, ready. WARNING: Do not take more than suggusted. Side effects include coma, brain... coma? That would be painless. How many should I take? The bottle was new. All of them would work. I closed my eyes, about to take the pills and jump into the lake, letting it pull me away. Wasn't noble. Wasn't how I was raised. But I need relief.
"STOP!" The voice shattered my thoughts, as I spun around. The pill bottle flew out of my hand, landing in the pond.
"What?!" Everything was moving in slow motion. HE ran up to me, yanking me back from the water's edge. I could feel the icy waves closing in around me... if he hadn't.... how dare he stop me.
"Don't do this. It feels rough, but don't." The man's voice was deep... he sounded so... I took a deep breath. "Please." His eyes where begging me to not. But...
"You don't know how it feels. No one would care."
"I would. Just, please. Don't."
"You don't know what it's like for me. You don't know me."
"You're fifteen. You hate high school. You're the outcast. Just... people care."
"I'm seventeen." I whispered. "Eighteen in a month."
"See? You have something to live for. Please."
"I don't know who you are."
"Here." He took my arm. "Let's sit and talk. Don't do anything rash." We walked over to the bench, as I sat down next to him. "Why?" The question was simple enough. As I thought over my answer, though it felt childish. Like it wasn't good enough.
"I'm a senior... I'm tied of being teased." I slowly went through the whole story, from day one of high school to now. It was painful. I cried and he comforted me. Who was he?
"What's your name?"
"Kayleigh." I gulped. "Kayleigh Janes."
"Kayleigh, I'm Booker Singleton. I promise, you'll get through this."
"Booker..." I liked the name; it was different. I looked into his eyes. They were dark and seemed to go on for forever... I was getting lost in them. I leaned against him, feeling his rock hard muscles through his thin shirt. He saved me. I took a deep breath. "I didn't think I would... it was like a trance. Telling me to. I had to. I thought..."
"I won't tell you that everything's fine. I won't say there, there or pat you on the back. Kayleigh, people need you. You aren't worthless. Your parents, your sister, they wouldn't want to see you gone."He cared too much. He was the stranger who saved me. And he cared too much. Why me? Why save me?
"Tell me something funny." I whispered in his ear. I felt weak. Like my body wasn't processing this. I sat up, looking at him. He was... like an angel. I didn't think that there was this thing, this afterlife, but he was an angel... my real life savior.
"Funny?"
"Please. Something to make me laugh."
"Okay." he launched into a story. It was funny. He was... special. I felt odd. I don't remember feeling like this towards anyone else. I...
"Wow." I giggled. He was hilarious.... I couldn't now. Not again. If I did get rid of myself, I would have wasted his time. His precious, handsome time. I was living because of him. For him.
"It's getting late. You parents must be worried. Let me drive you home. Talk to them."
"NO!" Booker was mine. He was my angel, my parents couldn't see him. "I'll take a cab."
"They should be told."
"I will...I will..." I won't. I wouldn't worry them. I wouldn't to it now, anyway. I tried and failed; it was a sign sent to me by my angel Booker. I didn't think he was a supernatural person, but he was the nicest person... it was almost magical, how nice he was.I stood up, ready to never see him again. I felt an odd feeling... something telling me that I wanted to see him, though. His personality was amazing... I could imagine my lips falling onto his, our... I took a breath. What was this? This sense of wanting for him.
"Wait. Please, Kayleigh." He called out, as I began to walk away. "Do something for me. Tomorrow night, meet me at the festival. We can talk... I want to make sure you're okay."
"Thank you. Wh-what time?"
"Four pm, I mean just for a bit. Your parents should come maybe, I mean ask them at least. I'm a thirty-five year old man and I don't want a misunderstanding to happen. I just... my brother. I'm here visiting him." I understood. He lost someone he loved to the something my parents were about to lose me to. Thirty-five. So mature, so handsome...
"I'll be there." And I would be. He needed to know I was okay; to know the world wouldn't lose someone again, because someone thought their life wasn't worth it. I had to live for him. I couldn't cause him anymore pain. My angel.
"Oh my gawd! Look at Kayleigh. Seriously, look at her. Did she switch bodies with a twin brother or something? Because she looks like a guy. And uh, loser alert. Does she think she's being sexy in that swimsuit? You know, she looks like a ten year old boy. Chubby, friendless, and flat as a board." Grace shouted insults at me, as I swam to the ladder on the side of the pool. Once a week in gym class, we would use the pool and swim laps or something. This gave the trifecta of bitchdom, the three most popular girls in our school who happen to get to shake their pompoms in mini skirt, making all the guys drool, also teased me. I hated them. For four years since high school began, I was their target. Thank goodness their was only two more months of high school left.
"Oh my gawd! Did she stain her swimsuit? Is that red?" A minion of Grace's asked.
"It totally is! Look, the ten year old boy's got his first period." I held back the tears. For one, my period ended last week. The cheer bitches were messing with me. Two, I started my period in fifth grade. I know for a fact that Grace's first one was during the freshman picnic.
"Look," I felt the tears coming. I didn't have an insult to throw at them and I was about to bawl my eyes out. Perfect. I ran to the changing rooms, hurling my self into a stall. My backpack sat at my feet, with my dress sticking out of it.
I hated this. I hated having to show up at school everyday and be teased for something I couldn't help. My boobs were tiny and I haven't had my first kiss. Great. Why did that make me the target of everyone's insults? I hated my life. My parents didn't know and what would they do? Seriously. Tell our ancient guidance consular? I can't take this through... I needed. I know what I needed. I slipped my dress over my head, ready to open the stall door, when I heard voices.
"Can you believe she actually cried?" Grace and her minions. My life was about to get a hell of a lot worse. Grace was the ring leader in a pink cheer leading outfit she always wore and the other two? Nobody knew who they were, but if you messed with them you'd have trouble starting with a G and ending in a R-A-C-E.
"Look, she's a baby. She got mommy and daddy and is such a stuck up bitch. She doesn't talk to anyone, like she's better than us. She hardly even looks at anyone."
"Did you hear the news? That her sister was, like, with another mom? A drug addict.Yeah, the dad cheated or something. I know her family's messed up, but really? Like, if you're gonna to cheat at least get someone who's hot and not just a junkie and a gold digger." Dad never cheated! Connie was before he met my mom and...
"I bet Kayleigh's on something."
"What, diet pills? Her thighs touch. Clearly fatties need it." I wasn't fat. I was perfectly healthy, in fact I was on the lower side of the scale. Ten pounds from underweight. I couldn't eat during school, or I might have to sit in the cafeteria with them, so I skipped lunch and hung out in the library. If you're going to talk about someone's weight, know the damn facts. Know the truth. They obviously didn't. I refrained from letting out a sniffle; my tears were pouring dow
n now.
"Look, girls. She needs to be taken down a peg."
"Totally, Grace."
"You're right, Grace."
"Here's what we'll do. Invite her to a and invite all the popular guys. Guys, befriend her and then go shopping and get her to wear something super slutty. Like, she dresses like a nun know. Seriously, she could dress better." I was seventeen, turning eighteen in a month. One month until I'm an adult, two months until I graduate high school. I don't need to be showing off my chest and butt to every guy in school, unlike Grace. "At the party, spill something on her. Like, buy a white dress for her than spill beer or something. Make sure that she drinks something before though and is kinda hazy. And no underwear, go it? Convince her to. Have some guy, like, shout stuff at her and we'll convince her to streak. Take pics and distribute around the school." Those... I hated my life. This is what they did in their free times? Plan to embarrass me and hurt my reputation? They didn't even have a good plan.
"My boyfriend's here, let's go."
"Ugh, you'll never let me live it down that I'm single and you're not."
"Well, if you didn't wanna stay a virgin until marriage, I might get you a guy."
"Please and be known as a slut? Ugh, not happening. Wait, does, you know, on my knees count?"
"Uh, yeah! Oh my gawd, what happened!?" I heard shrieks.
"Well,-" They exited the room, so I couldn't here the story.
This is what my life was going to be for the next two months? I couldn't take it. I exited the stall, running to hail a cab. I knew where I was going. It would be ironic, wouldn't it? Me visiting a graveyard. I bet the cheerleaders could laugh later. After all, they do think my life is a joke. I stepped into the graveyard, an icy chill shot through my veins. This was a bad idea. But I couldn't live like this. I hated my life. It would be better if I just... I slowly walked to the pond.
"Why?" A simple question. I had no answer. It might pain them, my parent, but all would be well. All would end well. I couldn't do this another minute. I took a deep breath. The moon shone bright, off the pond. It was a beautiful sight. Peaceful. I would hate to disturb it. I didn't want to go like this, the way of a coward. I had to, though. See, they hated me. If I were to go to that school, they would figuratively make me do it. Why not literally? It would be better... a rash choice, yeas. But better. I wouldn't be in the pain I was now.
The pond was a nice place to end. I wonder if anyone else had the same thought? Thought it was ironic. It was. They shouldn't have a pond in a place like this. Not when the grief over ran you. I set my backpack against a fence side. No note. It wouldn't be anything I could describe in words. I love you. I could write that. But it might be too painful for my mother to read, over and over and over again. My father was strong. He would help her.
I picked up the painkillers. Enough would knock me out. I wouldn't feel the end, the water rushing around me. Filling my lungs until they popped. None of that. I didn't know how it ended. The water doesn't let you get oxygen? That was probably something. I didn't have time to study it. I tilt my head back, ready. WARNING: Do not take more than suggusted. Side effects include coma, brain... coma? That would be painless. How many should I take? The bottle was new. All of them would work. I closed my eyes, about to take the pills and jump into the lake, letting it pull me away. Wasn't noble. Wasn't how I was raised. But I need relief.
"STOP!" The voice shattered my thoughts, as I spun around. The pill bottle flew out of my hand, landing in the pond.
"What?!" Everything was moving in slow motion. HE ran up to me, yanking me back from the water's edge. I could feel the icy waves closing in around me... if he hadn't.... how dare he stop me.
"Don't do this. It feels rough, but don't." The man's voice was deep... he sounded so... I took a deep breath. "Please." His eyes where begging me to not. But...
"You don't know how it feels. No one would care."
"I would. Just, please. Don't."
"You don't know what it's like for me. You don't know me."
"You're fifteen. You hate high school. You're the outcast. Just... people care."
"I'm seventeen." I whispered. "Eighteen in a month."
"See? You have something to live for. Please."
"I don't know who you are."
"Here." He took my arm. "Let's sit and talk. Don't do anything rash." We walked over to the bench, as I sat down next to him. "Why?" The question was simple enough. As I thought over my answer, though it felt childish. Like it wasn't good enough.
"I'm a senior... I'm tied of being teased." I slowly went through the whole story, from day one of high school to now. It was painful. I cried and he comforted me. Who was he?
"What's your name?"
"Kayleigh." I gulped. "Kayleigh Janes."
"Kayleigh, I'm Booker Singleton. I promise, you'll get through this."
"Booker..." I liked the name; it was different. I looked into his eyes. They were dark and seemed to go on for forever... I was getting lost in them. I leaned against him, feeling his rock hard muscles through his thin shirt. He saved me. I took a deep breath. "I didn't think I would... it was like a trance. Telling me to. I had to. I thought..."
"I won't tell you that everything's fine. I won't say there, there or pat you on the back. Kayleigh, people need you. You aren't worthless. Your parents, your sister, they wouldn't want to see you gone."He cared too much. He was the stranger who saved me. And he cared too much. Why me? Why save me?
"Tell me something funny." I whispered in his ear. I felt weak. Like my body wasn't processing this. I sat up, looking at him. He was... like an angel. I didn't think that there was this thing, this afterlife, but he was an angel... my real life savior.
"Funny?"
"Please. Something to make me laugh."
"Okay." he launched into a story. It was funny. He was... special. I felt odd. I don't remember feeling like this towards anyone else. I...
"Wow." I giggled. He was hilarious.... I couldn't now. Not again. If I did get rid of myself, I would have wasted his time. His precious, handsome time. I was living because of him. For him.
"It's getting late. You parents must be worried. Let me drive you home. Talk to them."
"NO!" Booker was mine. He was my angel, my parents couldn't see him. "I'll take a cab."
"They should be told."
"I will...I will..." I won't. I wouldn't worry them. I wouldn't to it now, anyway. I tried and failed; it was a sign sent to me by my angel Booker. I didn't think he was a supernatural person, but he was the nicest person... it was almost magical, how nice he was.I stood up, ready to never see him again. I felt an odd feeling... something telling me that I wanted to see him, though. His personality was amazing... I could imagine my lips falling onto his, our... I took a breath. What was this? This sense of wanting for him.
"Wait. Please, Kayleigh." He called out, as I began to walk away. "Do something for me. Tomorrow night, meet me at the festival. We can talk... I want to make sure you're okay."
"Thank you. Wh-what time?"
"Four pm, I mean just for a bit. Your parents should come maybe, I mean ask them at least. I'm a thirty-five year old man and I don't want a misunderstanding to happen. I just... my brother. I'm here visiting him." I understood. He lost someone he loved to the something my parents were about to lose me to. Thirty-five. So mature, so handsome...
"I'll be there." And I would be. He needed to know I was okay; to know the world wouldn't lose someone again, because someone thought their life wasn't worth it. I had to live for him. I couldn't cause him anymore pain. My angel.
And the Generation Heir is...
Kayleigh Janes! She barely won, with a vote of:
Connie- 7
Kayliegh- 8
Total- 15
I'll have a chapter out ASAP and since I'm on winter break I'll have tons of free time. Yay! I'm excited for this generation, I'm going to make it a little different. Also, if you would love a challenge, I'd like to reach 10,000 views by 2014! I currently have 9,368 views, so I need 632 more. With 12 days left of December (and 2013) I'm confident this blog with reach a view number with 5 digits.
Thanks a billion and a half!
Connie- 7
Kayliegh- 8
Total- 15
I'll have a chapter out ASAP and since I'm on winter break I'll have tons of free time. Yay! I'm excited for this generation, I'm going to make it a little different. Also, if you would love a challenge, I'd like to reach 10,000 views by 2014! I currently have 9,368 views, so I need 632 more. With 12 days left of December (and 2013) I'm confident this blog with reach a view number with 5 digits.
Thanks a billion and a half!
Monday, December 16, 2013
5.9: Charity
Kayleigh's POV...
"Hi Logan!" I squealed. He was mine; mommy gave him to me for my seventh birthday. I think Logan looks different. He has different spots and everything. Mommy says that he's just Logan, but I think he's different. "Mommy and daddy said that they had something important to tell me and I needed to come downstairs. Do you know what they're gonna tell me?" Logan squeaked a little, but I didn't speak shrew. I wish I did, cause then I could talk to Logan. I love animals, but I think I love the little ones best.
"Kayleigh!" I heard Connie call. I put Logan back in his terrarium. There was a new outfit laying on my bed and I quickly changed into it, throwing my jammies onto the floor. I was really curious about what they were gonna tell me. I thought maybe it was might be a surprise for my birthday, since it was yesterday. Did I say that I turned seven? I'm officially a big girl now. All the other girls in my class were already seven and they said I was the baby, but now I'm seven so I'm not the baby. I ran down the stairs, to the living room.
"Hi!" I waved at everyone. "What's up?"
"Kayleigh, please sit by daddy. Connie has something to tell us."
"Okay." I sat next to daddy, wondering what was going on. Connie wasn't in trouble, was she? I whispered in daddy's ear: "What's sissy gonna tell us?" Dad shrugged. He didn't know. I guess it was a really, really, really, really big surprise if daddy didn't know.
"Thank you all for coming." Connie began.
"I live here. And mommy and daddy made me come." I said.
"Kayleigh, honey, please don't interrupt your sister."
"Yes, mommy. Sorry, Connie."
"No, problem. As I was saying, thank you all for coming." She cleared her throat. "Now, you all know that my twentieth birthday is in two months." My parents nodded. "And today is the fourth anniversary of her death." Who was her? Connie looked sad.
"Connie, are you sad?"
"Shh!" Daddy shushed me. Oh yeah. No interrupting.
"I'm almost nineteen and living at home. I would like to spread my wings and move out, to Bridgeport, New York."
"Where Trevor is from?" It's funny when mommy calls daddy Trevor.
"Yep. See, it's a great city, bigger than this town, but not as large as NYC or as high profile."
"Why Bridgeport?" Daddy asked. "Why not a different town?"
"Bridgeport produces tons of actresses and actors every year. I would like to become an actress. See, I'm young enough to have a career, but not so young that I only get the child one parts."
"Why an actress?" I asked. I thought she wanted to be a writer.
"Well, I'd like to found a charity, named Remedies 4 Relapses. See, she was addicted. I wanted to have a charity that not only helps addicts get through the addiction, but helps the children. Maybe give them scholarships, or help send them to summer camps, or give them a mentor so they don't slip into the habits of their parents.
Many addicts can't pay for treatments, since they're broke. This charity would create a safe, healing atmosphere; it would offer therapy and, for those who are very far gone, would help pay for them to go to fancier treatment facilities. The R4R facility would have rooms, like a hotel, for the addict and their children to live in. It would be like a group home, only R4R helps keep each patient's home. Living in the facility would be free, each addict just has to do something to help maintain the place. Maybe they'd clean up after meals, or serve as a housekeeper, or prepare food.
The children would get to go to their school, like normal. During breaks and after school, they'd get to talk to therapists about how they feel, get help with homework, and overall have a safe, nurturing environment, ensuring that they grow up well.
After a team of doctors, including a team of therapists, say that the addict is cured, they will get one month to stay in the facility. We will help them get jobs, hopefully by helping out around the place they learn valuable skills, that will impress an employer."
"So... how does being an actress help. It sounds like a great idea, but why an actress?"
"As an actress I will be able to publicize the charity while doing movies and TV shows. I'll also be able to publish my memoir, about my childhood and how I began the charity, and receive more attention. After people read the book, I hope they donate to R4R."
"How will you begin? I mean, it sounds costly." Mommy glanced at daddy.
"We'll rent a building. I'll partner with the hospital, so that way we have the medical staff. I'm hoping we can begin with taking three to five addicts, depending on how many children they have."
"So, how will you get people to come? The people who need help, I mean." Daddy asked. They had lots of questions for Connie.
"We'll be a free alternative to court mandated rehab centers and have a better healing environment than a prison cell. When someone is arrested, the judge could send them to R4R. Also, we'll advertise and go to places where the people who need help are commonly found; they could voluntarily show up."
"Okay, but how will you pay the rent and for the ads?" Mommy questioned her.
"Well... this is why I'm telling you guys. I have a college fund of about 10K. That'll pay for my cost of living. I'm also thinking of earning a degree in social work through a college's internet program. I need about ten thousand more dollars to begin, though. If I want to provide for people I'll need a large facility, plus staff. Right now, I can't just rely on volunteers."
"We'll consider it." My parents said together.
"Thank you, thank you very much." Connie raised her arms in the arm and took a bow. She moved to the chair and sat down, listening to mommy and daddy talk.
"If she moved to Bridgeport, she could stay with my parents." Daddy said. I'd visited grandma and grandpa a few times before; it was always fun.
"Could I go to grandpa and grandma's?" I asked. Connie shouldn't be the only one who gets to have fun.
"Sometime, sweetie." Mommy said, turning back to daddy. "Trevor, you're parents? They would drive Connie crazy."
"No, they wouldn't. I mean..."
"Your two forty-something year old brother still live at home."
"Hunter and Blake? Yeah, they never really had the guts to go full on criminal...I heard Blake's dating this girl, though. He met her at the supermarket he works out."
"Seriously? Dad, no offense, but I really want to stay out. On my own."
"If you moved in, it would save money though."
"True, but if I got my own apartment I could always get roommates and live close to the R4R place."
"Do you even have a place picked out?"
"I've looked at a few, but I really need to see them and get the feel of them, before I agree to anything." Connie smiled, she must be happy now. "See, mom and dad, I need to experience-being a mature, responsible adult, if I will be a self-managed actress and charitable worker."
"I suppose."
"Really?! Ohmygod thank you so much! Thank you!" She jumped up, hugging mommy and daddy.
"On one condition. We'll give you a loan. In one year, if the thing is a success, you don't have to pay it back. If it flops, however, and you move back home, you pay back the full ten grand. You want to be responsible, here's your chance."
"Thank you!" This is how Connie moved out and got her start in the big, wide world. This was how I was stuck without a sister to talk to when things started going downhill in my life... this was why I was at where I was today. And I didn't regret it. Connie was happy; that was good. But me... the mystery of what would have happened if I had someone to talk to, like Connie, is one I"ll try and solve everyday.
"Hi Logan!" I squealed. He was mine; mommy gave him to me for my seventh birthday. I think Logan looks different. He has different spots and everything. Mommy says that he's just Logan, but I think he's different. "Mommy and daddy said that they had something important to tell me and I needed to come downstairs. Do you know what they're gonna tell me?" Logan squeaked a little, but I didn't speak shrew. I wish I did, cause then I could talk to Logan. I love animals, but I think I love the little ones best.
"Kayleigh!" I heard Connie call. I put Logan back in his terrarium. There was a new outfit laying on my bed and I quickly changed into it, throwing my jammies onto the floor. I was really curious about what they were gonna tell me. I thought maybe it was might be a surprise for my birthday, since it was yesterday. Did I say that I turned seven? I'm officially a big girl now. All the other girls in my class were already seven and they said I was the baby, but now I'm seven so I'm not the baby. I ran down the stairs, to the living room.
"Hi!" I waved at everyone. "What's up?"
"Kayleigh, please sit by daddy. Connie has something to tell us."
"Okay." I sat next to daddy, wondering what was going on. Connie wasn't in trouble, was she? I whispered in daddy's ear: "What's sissy gonna tell us?" Dad shrugged. He didn't know. I guess it was a really, really, really, really big surprise if daddy didn't know.
"Thank you all for coming." Connie began.
"I live here. And mommy and daddy made me come." I said.
"Kayleigh, honey, please don't interrupt your sister."
"Yes, mommy. Sorry, Connie."
"No, problem. As I was saying, thank you all for coming." She cleared her throat. "Now, you all know that my twentieth birthday is in two months." My parents nodded. "And today is the fourth anniversary of her death." Who was her? Connie looked sad.
"Connie, are you sad?"
"Shh!" Daddy shushed me. Oh yeah. No interrupting.
"I'm almost nineteen and living at home. I would like to spread my wings and move out, to Bridgeport, New York."
"Where Trevor is from?" It's funny when mommy calls daddy Trevor.
"Yep. See, it's a great city, bigger than this town, but not as large as NYC or as high profile."
"Why Bridgeport?" Daddy asked. "Why not a different town?"
"Bridgeport produces tons of actresses and actors every year. I would like to become an actress. See, I'm young enough to have a career, but not so young that I only get the child one parts."
"Why an actress?" I asked. I thought she wanted to be a writer.
"Well, I'd like to found a charity, named Remedies 4 Relapses. See, she was addicted. I wanted to have a charity that not only helps addicts get through the addiction, but helps the children. Maybe give them scholarships, or help send them to summer camps, or give them a mentor so they don't slip into the habits of their parents.
Many addicts can't pay for treatments, since they're broke. This charity would create a safe, healing atmosphere; it would offer therapy and, for those who are very far gone, would help pay for them to go to fancier treatment facilities. The R4R facility would have rooms, like a hotel, for the addict and their children to live in. It would be like a group home, only R4R helps keep each patient's home. Living in the facility would be free, each addict just has to do something to help maintain the place. Maybe they'd clean up after meals, or serve as a housekeeper, or prepare food.
The children would get to go to their school, like normal. During breaks and after school, they'd get to talk to therapists about how they feel, get help with homework, and overall have a safe, nurturing environment, ensuring that they grow up well.
After a team of doctors, including a team of therapists, say that the addict is cured, they will get one month to stay in the facility. We will help them get jobs, hopefully by helping out around the place they learn valuable skills, that will impress an employer."
"So... how does being an actress help. It sounds like a great idea, but why an actress?"
"As an actress I will be able to publicize the charity while doing movies and TV shows. I'll also be able to publish my memoir, about my childhood and how I began the charity, and receive more attention. After people read the book, I hope they donate to R4R."
"How will you begin? I mean, it sounds costly." Mommy glanced at daddy.
"We'll rent a building. I'll partner with the hospital, so that way we have the medical staff. I'm hoping we can begin with taking three to five addicts, depending on how many children they have."
"So, how will you get people to come? The people who need help, I mean." Daddy asked. They had lots of questions for Connie.
"We'll be a free alternative to court mandated rehab centers and have a better healing environment than a prison cell. When someone is arrested, the judge could send them to R4R. Also, we'll advertise and go to places where the people who need help are commonly found; they could voluntarily show up."
"Okay, but how will you pay the rent and for the ads?" Mommy questioned her.
"Well... this is why I'm telling you guys. I have a college fund of about 10K. That'll pay for my cost of living. I'm also thinking of earning a degree in social work through a college's internet program. I need about ten thousand more dollars to begin, though. If I want to provide for people I'll need a large facility, plus staff. Right now, I can't just rely on volunteers."
"We'll consider it." My parents said together.
"Thank you, thank you very much." Connie raised her arms in the arm and took a bow. She moved to the chair and sat down, listening to mommy and daddy talk.
"If she moved to Bridgeport, she could stay with my parents." Daddy said. I'd visited grandma and grandpa a few times before; it was always fun.
"Could I go to grandpa and grandma's?" I asked. Connie shouldn't be the only one who gets to have fun.
"Sometime, sweetie." Mommy said, turning back to daddy. "Trevor, you're parents? They would drive Connie crazy."
"No, they wouldn't. I mean..."
"Your two forty-something year old brother still live at home."
"Hunter and Blake? Yeah, they never really had the guts to go full on criminal...I heard Blake's dating this girl, though. He met her at the supermarket he works out."
"Seriously? Dad, no offense, but I really want to stay out. On my own."
"If you moved in, it would save money though."
"True, but if I got my own apartment I could always get roommates and live close to the R4R place."
"Do you even have a place picked out?"
"I've looked at a few, but I really need to see them and get the feel of them, before I agree to anything." Connie smiled, she must be happy now. "See, mom and dad, I need to experience-being a mature, responsible adult, if I will be a self-managed actress and charitable worker."
"I suppose."
"Really?! Ohmygod thank you so much! Thank you!" She jumped up, hugging mommy and daddy.
"On one condition. We'll give you a loan. In one year, if the thing is a success, you don't have to pay it back. If it flops, however, and you move back home, you pay back the full ten grand. You want to be responsible, here's your chance."
"Thank you!" This is how Connie moved out and got her start in the big, wide world. This was how I was stuck without a sister to talk to when things started going downhill in my life... this was why I was at where I was today. And I didn't regret it. Connie was happy; that was good. But me... the mystery of what would have happened if I had someone to talk to, like Connie, is one I"ll try and solve everyday.
Sunday, December 15, 2013
Generation Five Heir Vote
Yep, it's that time of the year... nope, I don't mean anything about the holidays (though I do hope your are happy), it's time for my generation five legacy heir vote!
First up, Kayleigh. She's the youngest child and is a family-oriented, neat, easily impressed, animal lover, and nurturing. She wants to own a daycare when she ages up into a young adult. Her generation will include her life as a teenager as she goes through high school and uncover some struggles she goes through, that end up changing who she is.
Second, there's Connie. She loves the outdoors, couch potato, diva, charismatic, and good. She wants to move back to Bridgeport, where their dad is from, and become an actress. She's going to come to realize that it isn't as easy becoming famous as she thought, but will find a different route to happiness.
Connie- 4
Kayleigh-3
You can also vote on the forums, just go HERE.
5.8: A Newer Addition
I probably should through up a warning, Alani and Parker have a little bit of a make out session. Yep, to keep this as not too bad as I can, I'm not using the other words.
I lay in bed, Alani next to me. Today was a particularly rough day; Kayleigh turned three yesterday and we invited a lot of our relatives. She spent all day began held and played with and unfortunately we didn't have time to squeeze in nap time. She was cranky and sleepy today, so Alani kept her home from what was suppose to be her first day of preschool. Truthfully, I think Alani is having trouble with not being able to stay with Kayleigh from nine to two; the overprotective mother defiantly wanted to keep her baby girl as close to her as possible.
"Honey." She groaned. "Hoooneey. Wake up." I felt myself being hit in the face with a pillow. Was Kayleigh okay? Was she crying? I didn't hear anything on the baby monitor. "Do you hear that?" I sat up, rubbing my eyes.
"What, it's-" I stole a glance at the clock. "Eleven. P.M. At night."
"You went to bed like an hour ago. We stayed up until one before the baby."
"I'll go check on her." I rolled out of bed, stretching. "Are you-?" She had already left the room and was sprinting up the attic stairwell.
"Kayleigh's fast asleep." She announced, after coming back to our room.
"I was going to check on her."
"I know, honey." She kissed me on the lips. "Since she's asleep, we could... you know."
"We agreed not with her in the house. But, mayyybe. We could."
"I'm tired of hiring a sitter and doing it in the backseat while parked on some hillside; it's like all those high school movies. Please. Break a rule. My rule. Break it." She posed incredibly sexy, and I knew I wanted her so badly. Alani and I have a tendency to get a little...rough. And incredibly loud. Like really, really loud. "I want you." Her voice was low.
"I want you more." I lifted her by her waist, as she wrapped her legs around my waist. I began kissing her neck, as we moved towards a wall.
"Oh...baby." She began moaning. I felt her tugging my shirt off, as I used one hand to work on her bra and the other to support her so she didn't fall.
"You're-" KNOCK! KNOCK! KNOCK! A loud rasping at our front door interrupted the steamy make out session- that was so close to being more. "Don't stop."
"What if it's important? Like...oh. Yeah. Just like that." She moaned a little. "Wait..." I gently sat her down, so she was standing on the floor.
"I can get it." I shrugged my shirt back on.
"Honestly, I will. Then we can back to, you know." We used the words you know a lot. It's as if any mention of W-O-O-H-O-O would wake up the baby.
"You're in a bra and short shorts. It's almost midnight. I am not letting my wife open the door to a stranger like that."
"So, we'll both go." I couldn't protest with her; she was stubborn. her small town mentality didn't think of anything going wrong. We walked downstairs, I carefully opened the door, blocking Alani from anyone's direct line of sight.
"Good, you answered. I was thinking I would have to leave. And that would, like, suck."
"Um, hi..." I greeted the girl standing on my front porch. Her clothing was old, torn, and worn, but you could tell by her face she couldn't be older than eighteen.
"Trevor, who's this...?" Alani looked concerned; a girl that young should be out alone at this time of night. "Honey, are you alright?"
"She died." she glanced down, a tear trickling down her face. "She died...now...I..." Her voice cracked.
"Come in." Alani took her hand, leading her to the living room. "Sit, sit. We can chat and call someone, okay?"
"Alright." She sniffled. A stranger- who was probably a minor- was sitting in our living room. Neither of us were dressed properly. How could this not end well? I sarcastically thought. The poor girl needed help, but why us? Why the strangers who lived on the edge of town instead of a relative or something?
"Who are you?" I asked. She was...was she familiar? She had...no. Small town; I probably saw her grocery shopping or something. "Who died?"
"I'm Connie. Connie Smith." Connie Smith. Con- oh fudge. Fudge. Fudge, fudge, fudge. I didn't swear- in or out of my head- but now was different. If this was what I thought. There was tension filling in the room quicker than a sinking boat fills with water. Alani's face showed her deep in thought. She recognized the name Smith, but couldn't remember where. She-
"Holy sugar! Trevor, what the fudge? Smith? Is she-? Honey," She turned towards Connie. She knew what I was thinking. She knew whose last name was Smith. "How old are you?"
"Sixteen." She took a deep breath. "I'm your daughter. I'm Trevor Janes' daughter."
"Oh no." Alani looked like she was crumbling. Like I had took a knife and stabbed her through the heart and than said that that I loved Jane more than I loved her. She was the one crying; Connie had stopped. "God Trevor. God. I'm a step-mother. I-I...I can't take this. I-" She stood up, pacing the room. She looked like she wanted to jump out the nearest window and run, but she instead sat down back at me.
"Wait. Did sh-he die?" If my long-lost daughter was suddenly in my living room with news of death... it had to mean one thing.
"Yes."
"No. I mean..." I didn't love her. I never did. I hadn't when we were... or when she left. But she was still a part of my life. She still was something that affected my relationship with Alani. "How?"
"We have a little balcony. She took a dive off...I... it happened last week. The police took her away. She was buried without a funeral and without a fuss. She loved me, I think...but. She was addicted. She bought the stuff like it was oxygen. I saw her snorting it or injecting it... when I was little, she passed out on the floor one day. I screamed the whole time she was out of it. It was sixteen hours. Sixteen hours of me sitting in my crib with no food or changes or anything...I mean, she tried. But we didn't have money. She had jobs off and on. She never told me, but I think... I think she sold her body. She bought me stuff, sometimes we'd get like a big TV, but then she would pawn it when the bills came. I think she couldn't take it. She didn't like living. I had a job, but I lost it once news got out...rumors, really. You're my only kin. I was going to be put in the foster system, but... but she left a not. I don't know if she was high, but the note read 'I love you, Connie. I'm sorry. I never told you who daddy was, but...' it was your name and address from when you were dating." My head was resting on my hands. Gods. This was horrible for someone as young as her to be going through all this... I didn't have the heart to tell her that we never dated. She was a gold digger who used me.. but she was her mother.
"Trevor, no. It can't be true. I mean, it has to be a lie. Get a paternity test. this could be a scheme. Money or something."
"Alani!" I gasped. She was a wonderful, caring mother and wife. This wasn't her.
"I understand. Her reputation wasn't good. I have one." She pulled it out from her back pocket. A court order stating that Trevor Janes had custody of Connie Smith and that he needed to report to the court house, the date read tomorrow to sign the papers. The official Appaloosa Plains town was exactly like it was on my paycheck. The second paper showed a paternity test done with my drug test when I first began my job and the results showing that Connie was indeed my child. Damn.
"No... no." Alani tore the papers from my hand, scanning them. "No. Not this. I-I..."
"Look..."
"Alani. My wife." I filled her in. "We also have a daughter, Kayleigh. She's three."
"Look, Alani. Mrs. Janes. What ever. I'm sorry. I didn't want this to happen. I was okay with it just being me and mom."
"I can't take this."
"Good, cause I can't either. Stop acting so damn high and mighty."
"Don't talk to me like that. Please." Venom laced her sticky sweet voice.
"Well, I suppose since you're my mom- oh wait, you're the leftovers. The second best. The thing my dad settled on after my mom. The housewife who's thinking her life is all white picket fences. I've been through worse than you could ever imagine. Don't treat me like crap. I'm tired of people acting like I am."
"It's seven am. So, uh. I'm going to get myself to work, than court. Uh..." I nervously stood by the door.
"Trevor, keep your butt in this room. Now." Alani glared at me.
"Yes, honey, baby, sweetie, beautiful."
"Oh, it's fine. I'm going to go to school. We can work this out when I get back." Connie stood up, sauntering out like she owned the place.
"Alani, it'll be fine."
"Trevor, I love you, you're adorable, but this is not fine. This is not fine. It's anything but." I stood there, shocked. She was cold. She was never like this. I had another daughter. I was shocked, but she was family... I screwed up and produced a life with..a now dead woman, but... Alani was expressionless. She was frozen.
"I have to get to work...Don't murder anyone." I joked, trying to lighten mood. She sat there, staring out the window. She didn't try to acknowledge the awful joke. She usually laughed at my jokes and said how bad I was. But...she changed in the little time it took us to talk to my daughter. Who was this lady sitting in my living room? My wife? I slowly walked to the door. Just as I was shutting it, I heard a whisper.
"Don't count on it."
NOTE: Woah! What was that? D-R-A-M-A, that's what. You know that crappy short post about the wedding. Yeah, this super long post is my way of making up for it. In fact, I'm going to make this a part one/two chapter. SInce I'm so pumped, though I'll just post the slightly shorter part two after this side note. Yay, more reading. More drama, more Janes! The following part will be a few days later, in Connie's perspective ( her POV)....
I can't believe Dad is making me take this bonding trip with Alani. She hates me, I know it. Even worse, Kayleigh has come along, since Dad worked until six. Of course, Alani doesn't. This really is a glorified makeover. I know that my clothes are ripped and dirty; but I'm not embarrassed. I worked hard to cloth myself and couldn't throw any of it out just because I tore it a tad. Maybe more than a tad.
A new wardrobe will be nice; this doesn't cover up the fact that at the stylists, my step-mommy darling will be the one giving me a makeover. Yes, they're buying me clothes I could only own by illegal means when I was living with my Mom, but... it's being paid for my the guy I barely know and the wife who hates me. Kayleigh's adorable, though. I love playing with her. She giggles and is so cute. She's like a little ray of sunshine in my mess of a life. She's too young to know what's going on and just calls me 'Sisa.' Sisa! I'm smitten with her; honestly I can't believe I haven't realized how preciously cute a human could be.
Dad bought me a loft and set it up in Kayleigh's nursery. Lucky me! Really, some teens would complain that a toddler is a bratty annoyance, but I love spending time with her. I guess seeing her so happy makes me wish I had her childhood... it causes my to spoil her with attention a bit, much to Alani's displeasure. She's the cutest little sister ever, even if we're only half-sisters.
"So," My step-monster took a breath. "Let's get started."
"Huh?" What was I suppose to do?
"Step up onto the platform by the mirrors. I'll style your hair, maybe a trim. get you some new clothes and everything. The works."
"Yeah. Okay. You do that."
"Hmm...you're a twig." Because my mother could barely affords to feed me. "So that may work to your advantage when picking out clothes." Really? Gee, thanks. Hint, hint, nudge, nudge. Sarcasm. She quickly picked an array of outfits in a rainbow of colors. With with hair cut into a cute bob and a swipe of a credit card, my makeover was complete.
"Why do you hate me?" I asked, out of the blue. We where sitting in the car; I was in the back next to Kayleigh who was sleeping in her car seat.
"What?!" Alani looked back at me, startled. She nearly swerved off the road! "WHy do you think I hate you?"
"You're cold to me and everything and ignore me.. I just. Never mind."
"I don't hate you. I'm... Connie, it took thirteen years for you dad to agree to have a baby. Thirteen years. Now... I'm too old. I can't. Kayleigh's going to be my only child."
"I'm sorry." I said.
"It's fine, I just... when I learned that you had come along, it made me think that he didn't trust me Or.. that he didn't love me enough to have a child with me."
"I..." She thought she wasn't good enough, since I had shown up. "You are, you know. Good enough."
"Thanks... I love you, Connie. I really do. I have trouble, though."
"I love you, too. Mom." I glanced in the mirror. There was tears in the corner of her eyes; she was that happy. I guess maybe being the step-child isn't so bad...it sure as hell is better than my other life.
I lay in bed, Alani next to me. Today was a particularly rough day; Kayleigh turned three yesterday and we invited a lot of our relatives. She spent all day began held and played with and unfortunately we didn't have time to squeeze in nap time. She was cranky and sleepy today, so Alani kept her home from what was suppose to be her first day of preschool. Truthfully, I think Alani is having trouble with not being able to stay with Kayleigh from nine to two; the overprotective mother defiantly wanted to keep her baby girl as close to her as possible.
"Honey." She groaned. "Hoooneey. Wake up." I felt myself being hit in the face with a pillow. Was Kayleigh okay? Was she crying? I didn't hear anything on the baby monitor. "Do you hear that?" I sat up, rubbing my eyes.
"What, it's-" I stole a glance at the clock. "Eleven. P.M. At night."
"You went to bed like an hour ago. We stayed up until one before the baby."
"I'll go check on her." I rolled out of bed, stretching. "Are you-?" She had already left the room and was sprinting up the attic stairwell.
"Kayleigh's fast asleep." She announced, after coming back to our room.
"I was going to check on her."
"I know, honey." She kissed me on the lips. "Since she's asleep, we could... you know."
"We agreed not with her in the house. But, mayyybe. We could."
"I'm tired of hiring a sitter and doing it in the backseat while parked on some hillside; it's like all those high school movies. Please. Break a rule. My rule. Break it." She posed incredibly sexy, and I knew I wanted her so badly. Alani and I have a tendency to get a little...rough. And incredibly loud. Like really, really loud. "I want you." Her voice was low.
"I want you more." I lifted her by her waist, as she wrapped her legs around my waist. I began kissing her neck, as we moved towards a wall.
"Oh...baby." She began moaning. I felt her tugging my shirt off, as I used one hand to work on her bra and the other to support her so she didn't fall.
"You're-" KNOCK! KNOCK! KNOCK! A loud rasping at our front door interrupted the steamy make out session- that was so close to being more. "Don't stop."
"What if it's important? Like...oh. Yeah. Just like that." She moaned a little. "Wait..." I gently sat her down, so she was standing on the floor.
"I can get it." I shrugged my shirt back on.
"Honestly, I will. Then we can back to, you know." We used the words you know a lot. It's as if any mention of W-O-O-H-O-O would wake up the baby.
"You're in a bra and short shorts. It's almost midnight. I am not letting my wife open the door to a stranger like that."
"So, we'll both go." I couldn't protest with her; she was stubborn. her small town mentality didn't think of anything going wrong. We walked downstairs, I carefully opened the door, blocking Alani from anyone's direct line of sight.
"Good, you answered. I was thinking I would have to leave. And that would, like, suck."
"Um, hi..." I greeted the girl standing on my front porch. Her clothing was old, torn, and worn, but you could tell by her face she couldn't be older than eighteen.
"Trevor, who's this...?" Alani looked concerned; a girl that young should be out alone at this time of night. "Honey, are you alright?"
"She died." she glanced down, a tear trickling down her face. "She died...now...I..." Her voice cracked.
"Come in." Alani took her hand, leading her to the living room. "Sit, sit. We can chat and call someone, okay?"
"Alright." She sniffled. A stranger- who was probably a minor- was sitting in our living room. Neither of us were dressed properly. How could this not end well? I sarcastically thought. The poor girl needed help, but why us? Why the strangers who lived on the edge of town instead of a relative or something?
"Who are you?" I asked. She was...was she familiar? She had...no. Small town; I probably saw her grocery shopping or something. "Who died?"
"I'm Connie. Connie Smith." Connie Smith. Con- oh fudge. Fudge. Fudge, fudge, fudge. I didn't swear- in or out of my head- but now was different. If this was what I thought. There was tension filling in the room quicker than a sinking boat fills with water. Alani's face showed her deep in thought. She recognized the name Smith, but couldn't remember where. She-
"Holy sugar! Trevor, what the fudge? Smith? Is she-? Honey," She turned towards Connie. She knew what I was thinking. She knew whose last name was Smith. "How old are you?"
"Sixteen." She took a deep breath. "I'm your daughter. I'm Trevor Janes' daughter."
"Oh no." Alani looked like she was crumbling. Like I had took a knife and stabbed her through the heart and than said that that I loved Jane more than I loved her. She was the one crying; Connie had stopped. "God Trevor. God. I'm a step-mother. I-I...I can't take this. I-" She stood up, pacing the room. She looked like she wanted to jump out the nearest window and run, but she instead sat down back at me.
"Wait. Did sh-he die?" If my long-lost daughter was suddenly in my living room with news of death... it had to mean one thing.
"Yes."
"No. I mean..." I didn't love her. I never did. I hadn't when we were... or when she left. But she was still a part of my life. She still was something that affected my relationship with Alani. "How?"
"We have a little balcony. She took a dive off...I... it happened last week. The police took her away. She was buried without a funeral and without a fuss. She loved me, I think...but. She was addicted. She bought the stuff like it was oxygen. I saw her snorting it or injecting it... when I was little, she passed out on the floor one day. I screamed the whole time she was out of it. It was sixteen hours. Sixteen hours of me sitting in my crib with no food or changes or anything...I mean, she tried. But we didn't have money. She had jobs off and on. She never told me, but I think... I think she sold her body. She bought me stuff, sometimes we'd get like a big TV, but then she would pawn it when the bills came. I think she couldn't take it. She didn't like living. I had a job, but I lost it once news got out...rumors, really. You're my only kin. I was going to be put in the foster system, but... but she left a not. I don't know if she was high, but the note read 'I love you, Connie. I'm sorry. I never told you who daddy was, but...' it was your name and address from when you were dating." My head was resting on my hands. Gods. This was horrible for someone as young as her to be going through all this... I didn't have the heart to tell her that we never dated. She was a gold digger who used me.. but she was her mother.
"Trevor, no. It can't be true. I mean, it has to be a lie. Get a paternity test. this could be a scheme. Money or something."
"Alani!" I gasped. She was a wonderful, caring mother and wife. This wasn't her.
"I understand. Her reputation wasn't good. I have one." She pulled it out from her back pocket. A court order stating that Trevor Janes had custody of Connie Smith and that he needed to report to the court house, the date read tomorrow to sign the papers. The official Appaloosa Plains town was exactly like it was on my paycheck. The second paper showed a paternity test done with my drug test when I first began my job and the results showing that Connie was indeed my child. Damn.
"No... no." Alani tore the papers from my hand, scanning them. "No. Not this. I-I..."
"Look..."
"Alani. My wife." I filled her in. "We also have a daughter, Kayleigh. She's three."
"Look, Alani. Mrs. Janes. What ever. I'm sorry. I didn't want this to happen. I was okay with it just being me and mom."
"I can't take this."
"Good, cause I can't either. Stop acting so damn high and mighty."
"Don't talk to me like that. Please." Venom laced her sticky sweet voice.
"Well, I suppose since you're my mom- oh wait, you're the leftovers. The second best. The thing my dad settled on after my mom. The housewife who's thinking her life is all white picket fences. I've been through worse than you could ever imagine. Don't treat me like crap. I'm tired of people acting like I am."
"It's seven am. So, uh. I'm going to get myself to work, than court. Uh..." I nervously stood by the door.
"Trevor, keep your butt in this room. Now." Alani glared at me.
"Yes, honey, baby, sweetie, beautiful."
"Oh, it's fine. I'm going to go to school. We can work this out when I get back." Connie stood up, sauntering out like she owned the place.
"Alani, it'll be fine."
"Trevor, I love you, you're adorable, but this is not fine. This is not fine. It's anything but." I stood there, shocked. She was cold. She was never like this. I had another daughter. I was shocked, but she was family... I screwed up and produced a life with..a now dead woman, but... Alani was expressionless. She was frozen.
"I have to get to work...Don't murder anyone." I joked, trying to lighten mood. She sat there, staring out the window. She didn't try to acknowledge the awful joke. She usually laughed at my jokes and said how bad I was. But...she changed in the little time it took us to talk to my daughter. Who was this lady sitting in my living room? My wife? I slowly walked to the door. Just as I was shutting it, I heard a whisper.
"Don't count on it."
NOTE: Woah! What was that? D-R-A-M-A, that's what. You know that crappy short post about the wedding. Yeah, this super long post is my way of making up for it. In fact, I'm going to make this a part one/two chapter. SInce I'm so pumped, though I'll just post the slightly shorter part two after this side note. Yay, more reading. More drama, more Janes! The following part will be a few days later, in Connie's perspective ( her POV)....
I can't believe Dad is making me take this bonding trip with Alani. She hates me, I know it. Even worse, Kayleigh has come along, since Dad worked until six. Of course, Alani doesn't. This really is a glorified makeover. I know that my clothes are ripped and dirty; but I'm not embarrassed. I worked hard to cloth myself and couldn't throw any of it out just because I tore it a tad. Maybe more than a tad.
A new wardrobe will be nice; this doesn't cover up the fact that at the stylists, my step-mommy darling will be the one giving me a makeover. Yes, they're buying me clothes I could only own by illegal means when I was living with my Mom, but... it's being paid for my the guy I barely know and the wife who hates me. Kayleigh's adorable, though. I love playing with her. She giggles and is so cute. She's like a little ray of sunshine in my mess of a life. She's too young to know what's going on and just calls me 'Sisa.' Sisa! I'm smitten with her; honestly I can't believe I haven't realized how preciously cute a human could be.
Dad bought me a loft and set it up in Kayleigh's nursery. Lucky me! Really, some teens would complain that a toddler is a bratty annoyance, but I love spending time with her. I guess seeing her so happy makes me wish I had her childhood... it causes my to spoil her with attention a bit, much to Alani's displeasure. She's the cutest little sister ever, even if we're only half-sisters.
"So," My step-monster took a breath. "Let's get started."
"Huh?" What was I suppose to do?
"Step up onto the platform by the mirrors. I'll style your hair, maybe a trim. get you some new clothes and everything. The works."
"Yeah. Okay. You do that."
"Hmm...you're a twig." Because my mother could barely affords to feed me. "So that may work to your advantage when picking out clothes." Really? Gee, thanks. Hint, hint, nudge, nudge. Sarcasm. She quickly picked an array of outfits in a rainbow of colors. With with hair cut into a cute bob and a swipe of a credit card, my makeover was complete.
"Why do you hate me?" I asked, out of the blue. We where sitting in the car; I was in the back next to Kayleigh who was sleeping in her car seat.
"What?!" Alani looked back at me, startled. She nearly swerved off the road! "WHy do you think I hate you?"
"You're cold to me and everything and ignore me.. I just. Never mind."
"I don't hate you. I'm... Connie, it took thirteen years for you dad to agree to have a baby. Thirteen years. Now... I'm too old. I can't. Kayleigh's going to be my only child."
"I'm sorry." I said.
"It's fine, I just... when I learned that you had come along, it made me think that he didn't trust me Or.. that he didn't love me enough to have a child with me."
"I..." She thought she wasn't good enough, since I had shown up. "You are, you know. Good enough."
"Thanks... I love you, Connie. I really do. I have trouble, though."
"I love you, too. Mom." I glanced in the mirror. There was tears in the corner of her eyes; she was that happy. I guess maybe being the step-child isn't so bad...it sure as hell is better than my other life.
Thursday, December 12, 2013
5.7: A New Addition
I sat on the couch, looking at the drawing. There was a large house fire a few nights ago. A little girl was crying that her Pelly was being burned up. I asked her mother what she meant; if Pelly was a dog or animal. Pelly was her pelican she bought at Disney World... I raced into the house, completely reckless, not thinking about how it was burning tot he ground and I had just carried the little girl out of the home.... I went to her room and got her Pelly toy. The drawing was a thank you note; a colorful crayon drawing of Pelly and a large 'Thank you for saving Pelly- I love her!'. This is why I did what I loved. For this. Not to be paid, not to receive the recognition. For the small thank yous. For making someone's day and seeing them smile a bit brighter. Saving someone's life wasn't anything compared to saving someone's memories. Someone's treasure- no matter how sentimental. That was what the job was about.
"What's up?" Alani glanced at me.
"Look what the little girl- the one I told you about- drew."
"Aww. That's adorable! Trevor."
"I'm ready."
"For what?"
"Remember when you said you wanted kids?"
"Yeah...Trevor, that was two years ago."
"It was?" I asked, shocked. It couldn't have been that long... time passed so quickly.
"Yeah." She nodded. "I'm thirty-eight."
"You don't look it." I laughed. "You look just as young as when I met you and twice as beautiful." It sounded cliche, but it was true. She was the most gorgeous woman I knew and the only one who I loved as much as I did; it would be impossible to live without her. it was a fact.
"You're so sweet."
"Alani, would you like to have a baby with me?" I asked, smiling slightly.
"Really? Seriously? Yes. Defiantly. You shouldn't have to ask that question.."
"When?"
"Now. Why wait? The clock is ticking." She smiled seductively at me. She leaned forwards whispering in my ear, "Let's make a baby." That's all I needed to hear. I was ready to start a family with the woman I loved. It had taken a while, but I was finally ready.
Nine months later...Alani's POV...
"Hi, Logan." I cooed. I had the odd maternal sense to buy a shrew, ever since Trevor I agreed to try, and were successful, at starting a baby. Technically, I want a puppy, but Trevor insisted we start small.
I turned to glance at the room. We had kept the gender of the baby a surprise and it was killing me. I has enough surprises with the constant vomiting and weird thingies. Trust me, if you want the glow, shell out the cash to go to a damn tanning salon. Don't a cheap sake. I wanted a family- but the pain. I loved the baby, but gawd. It hurt. A lot. I waddled down the steps, to the first floor. The third floor attic was a great renovation on our part- not installing an elevator? That was plum foolish.
"HI honey." Trevor greeted me. "Do you need to rest? Or-"
"I want this baby out. You here? Out."
"You look beautiful."
"Shut up. I'm fat and haven't shaved my legs since... this baby came into me. I want it out."
"Don't think you get a choice."
"I want this baby now."
"I love you so much." He leaned forward, kissing the top of my head."Alani? Alani, are you okay?" He paused for a minute. "Look, I'm sorry. Just say something."
"I'm having a baby."
"Yes, I know. I was there when it was conceived. I helped."
"No...no." I gripped my stomach. "Trevor."
"Are you-" He stopped mid sentence. It came to him.
"My water just broke."
"We have to get you to the hospital."
"Contractions...not far enough apart."
"Let's just. I don't know." He began pacing the room. "Come on. Get in the car."
"They won't admit me."
"Honey, I was born at home. This isn't happening to our baby."'
"Help me." He quickly rushed over to me, as I began panting. I leaned against him, needing the support. We arrived at the hospital a few minutes later. Want to know something? Turns out I was much further along than I expected. Turns out I was two centimeters away from having a baby.
"PUSH, PUSH, PUSH!" The nurse screamed at me.
"I"M PUSHING!"
"Harder. The heads out, we need to get the shoulders out."
"Just take a breath and breath. One, two-" Trevor began.
"SHUT UP! I am PUSHING. Are you blind?"
"I love you." He timidly said.
"Congratulations! It's a girl."
"A girl?" I gasped, excitedly. I secretly wanted one.
"What would you like to name her?" The nurse asked.
"Kayleigh." Trevor and I said in unison. Kayleigh , Trevor, and I. We were the perfect family. Really, everything was wonderful...until. Until she came. The girl that no longer made us a small family of three. But at that moment, when I was unaware of the mess awaiting, I was the happiest I'd ever been. We took Kayleigh home and everything felt great. For now.
"What's up?" Alani glanced at me.
"Look what the little girl- the one I told you about- drew."
"Aww. That's adorable! Trevor."
"I'm ready."
"For what?"
"Remember when you said you wanted kids?"
"Yeah...Trevor, that was two years ago."
"It was?" I asked, shocked. It couldn't have been that long... time passed so quickly.
"Yeah." She nodded. "I'm thirty-eight."
"You don't look it." I laughed. "You look just as young as when I met you and twice as beautiful." It sounded cliche, but it was true. She was the most gorgeous woman I knew and the only one who I loved as much as I did; it would be impossible to live without her. it was a fact.
"You're so sweet."
"Alani, would you like to have a baby with me?" I asked, smiling slightly.
"Really? Seriously? Yes. Defiantly. You shouldn't have to ask that question.."
"When?"
"Now. Why wait? The clock is ticking." She smiled seductively at me. She leaned forwards whispering in my ear, "Let's make a baby." That's all I needed to hear. I was ready to start a family with the woman I loved. It had taken a while, but I was finally ready.
Nine months later...Alani's POV...
"Hi, Logan." I cooed. I had the odd maternal sense to buy a shrew, ever since Trevor I agreed to try, and were successful, at starting a baby. Technically, I want a puppy, but Trevor insisted we start small.
I turned to glance at the room. We had kept the gender of the baby a surprise and it was killing me. I has enough surprises with the constant vomiting and weird thingies. Trust me, if you want the glow, shell out the cash to go to a damn tanning salon. Don't a cheap sake. I wanted a family- but the pain. I loved the baby, but gawd. It hurt. A lot. I waddled down the steps, to the first floor. The third floor attic was a great renovation on our part- not installing an elevator? That was plum foolish.
"HI honey." Trevor greeted me. "Do you need to rest? Or-"
"I want this baby out. You here? Out."
"You look beautiful."
"Shut up. I'm fat and haven't shaved my legs since... this baby came into me. I want it out."
"Don't think you get a choice."
"I want this baby now."
"I love you so much." He leaned forward, kissing the top of my head."Alani? Alani, are you okay?" He paused for a minute. "Look, I'm sorry. Just say something."
"I'm having a baby."
"Yes, I know. I was there when it was conceived. I helped."
"No...no." I gripped my stomach. "Trevor."
"Are you-" He stopped mid sentence. It came to him.
"My water just broke."
"We have to get you to the hospital."
"Contractions...not far enough apart."
"Let's just. I don't know." He began pacing the room. "Come on. Get in the car."
"They won't admit me."
"Honey, I was born at home. This isn't happening to our baby."'
"Help me." He quickly rushed over to me, as I began panting. I leaned against him, needing the support. We arrived at the hospital a few minutes later. Want to know something? Turns out I was much further along than I expected. Turns out I was two centimeters away from having a baby.
"PUSH, PUSH, PUSH!" The nurse screamed at me.
"I"M PUSHING!"
"Harder. The heads out, we need to get the shoulders out."
"Just take a breath and breath. One, two-" Trevor began.
"SHUT UP! I am PUSHING. Are you blind?"
"I love you." He timidly said.
"Congratulations! It's a girl."
"A girl?" I gasped, excitedly. I secretly wanted one.
"What would you like to name her?" The nurse asked.
"Kayleigh." Trevor and I said in unison. Kayleigh , Trevor, and I. We were the perfect family. Really, everything was wonderful...until. Until she came. The girl that no longer made us a small family of three. But at that moment, when I was unaware of the mess awaiting, I was the happiest I'd ever been. We took Kayleigh home and everything felt great. For now.
Tuesday, December 10, 2013
5.6 Part Two: Almost Lost You
We where celebrating our four year anniversary today. Alani and I where over the moon that we'd been married for four years and together for eleven. I decided to celebrate by whisking her off to Egypt for a week. Bridgeport was snowy and cold, while the Egyptian sun let us bask in its heat.
"This is so romantic!" Alani squeled. "I love it!"
"It's just a tent." I chuckled. She was so happy and excited all the time; it's what I love about her.
"Come on, let's take a picture." She pulled out her phone as I leaned in for a kiss. "Perfect!" She glanced at the photo.
"Let's go to the Great Pyramid." I said, excitedly. If she thought this was great, just wait.
"Okay, sound great."
We biked to the tombs quickly. A tour guide offered to show us around, but we preferred to do things on our own. It was more adventurous that way. I looked over the wall, feeling for the cracks. I found them and pushed the door open. The nights spent working at the gym had paid off.
"It's kinda creepy in here." Alani said.
"It isn't that bad I m-AHHH!" I screamed.
"You're screaming like a little g-OHMYGAWD. Bugs!" Bugs where crawling all over my hand; I hadn't noticed when we opened the tomb door, but they must have crawled onto my skin. I quickly brushed them off, embarrassed that I had let out such a shrill noise.
We pulled the statues onto the hidden spot, as a secret door flew open. We carefully stepped into a vast room, filled with treasure. Alani glanced at me, as I glanced at her. This had to be booby trapped somehow, someway, right? Old mummy movies had been a large part of my research done preparing for this trip. We tiptoed to the other side, hoping nothing would trigger.
"We need a keystone. Look at the door."
"Oh, no." I sighed. We tiptoed back through the palace, to the statue room.
Alani's POV...
I spotted a hidden door in the corner and dashed to it.Trevor followed me. It led us into a room with a flaming floor; on the other side of the crimson blaze their was a star shaped keystone. The one we needed so desperately.
"Don't go through the flames." Trevor gripped me elbow, pulling me away.
"Trevor, I'll be fine. it probably isn't even real fire."
"Who uses fake fire? Alani, it's dangerous."
"Don't worry, I'll be fine."
"Please don't."
"Look! I'm an adult. I can make me own choices. Stop."
"I-" I pulled away, taking a step forwards. There was a thin pathway around the flames. Unfortunately, I wasn't coordinated enough to stay on the path. The fire caught on my shirt, as I screamed. It was defiantly real fire.
"Trevor!" He stood there in shock, a tear coming to his eye. I made my husband cry. That's a new one. I felt the flames scorching my skin, as his hands pulled me away. He doused my with water from our canteens, smothering the flames out with a bandana.
"We're going."
"Yeah." I faintly said. My skin was burnt; I could feel the pain.
"Let' get you to a medical center."
"I didn't mean to. Really. I didn't know." He was angry. I hated seeing him upset and knowing that I had caused the misery approaching us. Damn.
Six days later...
"We leave tomorrow." I said, stepping out of the tent. He was sitting at a picnic table, shirtless. He looked so sexy with the moonlight and the stars and wilderness. I wanted to take him into the tent and oh... let him just do all types of things. "I'm sorry." He hadn't talked to me really since the pyramid the first night we arrived.
"It's fine. I can't stand the not talking anymore."
"Look," I walked over to him. I planted a kiss on his lips. "I wouldn't do anything like that if I thought I'd hurt you."
"I just... Alani."
"Watch the star with me. We can talk."
"Okay." He sat on the ground with me. "We've both seen people's lives ruined because of the flames. I came to close to losing you today. If I did, I don't know what I would have done. I might have thrown myself into the flames after you so at least I could of held you one last time..."
"Trevor." I felt myself becoming weepy. "That isn't gong to happen."
"How do you know? How? Alani, nobody thought it would. Not a single person we saved was like, 'Hey I knew about this. Totally knew it was gonna happen' Nobody."
"Can we have a baby?" I bite my lips as soon as the words left my lips. It was out of the blue and completely unrelated to the topic.
"Are you pregnant?" He smiled a little and glanced towards my stomach.
"No...but I'm thirty-six. And I want a family."
"Not yet... sometime. I just don't want to risk anything." His gaze softened. "I would love to have a family with you. There's nobody I rather would.. but not yet. I'm not ready."
"But I am! Besides, you'll have nine months to be ready. I just...if I wait to long, eventually I won't get to have one." I wanted a family. I had never brought it up, but now... it just felt like we should. Like we where ready. I set myself on fire. That was accidentally. It was behind us. I just... I sighed. I saw Trevor nervous. He was adorable when he was nervous.
"We can have a baby."
"You don't want one."
"I'd love him or her, though. I want you to be happy. If a baby makes you happy, we can have a baby."
"No. No... just. I'm going to sleep." I stood up, brushing off the sand. Any thoughts of a romantic night where off. Trevor just wanted to protect his family... the family I wanted to grow. What would it take to make him ready?
"This is so romantic!" Alani squeled. "I love it!"
"It's just a tent." I chuckled. She was so happy and excited all the time; it's what I love about her.
"Come on, let's take a picture." She pulled out her phone as I leaned in for a kiss. "Perfect!" She glanced at the photo.
"Let's go to the Great Pyramid." I said, excitedly. If she thought this was great, just wait.
"Okay, sound great."
We biked to the tombs quickly. A tour guide offered to show us around, but we preferred to do things on our own. It was more adventurous that way. I looked over the wall, feeling for the cracks. I found them and pushed the door open. The nights spent working at the gym had paid off.
"It's kinda creepy in here." Alani said.
"It isn't that bad I m-AHHH!" I screamed.
"You're screaming like a little g-OHMYGAWD. Bugs!" Bugs where crawling all over my hand; I hadn't noticed when we opened the tomb door, but they must have crawled onto my skin. I quickly brushed them off, embarrassed that I had let out such a shrill noise.
We pulled the statues onto the hidden spot, as a secret door flew open. We carefully stepped into a vast room, filled with treasure. Alani glanced at me, as I glanced at her. This had to be booby trapped somehow, someway, right? Old mummy movies had been a large part of my research done preparing for this trip. We tiptoed to the other side, hoping nothing would trigger.
"We need a keystone. Look at the door."
"Oh, no." I sighed. We tiptoed back through the palace, to the statue room.
Alani's POV...
I spotted a hidden door in the corner and dashed to it.Trevor followed me. It led us into a room with a flaming floor; on the other side of the crimson blaze their was a star shaped keystone. The one we needed so desperately.
"Don't go through the flames." Trevor gripped me elbow, pulling me away.
"Trevor, I'll be fine. it probably isn't even real fire."
"Who uses fake fire? Alani, it's dangerous."
"Don't worry, I'll be fine."
"Please don't."
"Look! I'm an adult. I can make me own choices. Stop."
"I-" I pulled away, taking a step forwards. There was a thin pathway around the flames. Unfortunately, I wasn't coordinated enough to stay on the path. The fire caught on my shirt, as I screamed. It was defiantly real fire.
"Trevor!" He stood there in shock, a tear coming to his eye. I made my husband cry. That's a new one. I felt the flames scorching my skin, as his hands pulled me away. He doused my with water from our canteens, smothering the flames out with a bandana.
"We're going."
"Yeah." I faintly said. My skin was burnt; I could feel the pain.
"Alani." He said, hurt. He had warned me and I didn't listen. Now I was scarred. He picked me up, ignoring my argues that I could walk. I caused him enough stress and pain. My clothes where nearly burnt off; I was left in singed scraps of fabric. I hugged him, glad that he was there. I couldn't dare think of what would happen if he hadn't been there during my reckless jaunt into the flames.
"I'm sorry." I whimpered."Let' get you to a medical center."
"I didn't mean to. Really. I didn't know." He was angry. I hated seeing him upset and knowing that I had caused the misery approaching us. Damn.
Six days later...
"We leave tomorrow." I said, stepping out of the tent. He was sitting at a picnic table, shirtless. He looked so sexy with the moonlight and the stars and wilderness. I wanted to take him into the tent and oh... let him just do all types of things. "I'm sorry." He hadn't talked to me really since the pyramid the first night we arrived.
"It's fine. I can't stand the not talking anymore."
"Look," I walked over to him. I planted a kiss on his lips. "I wouldn't do anything like that if I thought I'd hurt you."
"I just... Alani."
"Watch the star with me. We can talk."
"Okay." He sat on the ground with me. "We've both seen people's lives ruined because of the flames. I came to close to losing you today. If I did, I don't know what I would have done. I might have thrown myself into the flames after you so at least I could of held you one last time..."
"Trevor." I felt myself becoming weepy. "That isn't gong to happen."
"How do you know? How? Alani, nobody thought it would. Not a single person we saved was like, 'Hey I knew about this. Totally knew it was gonna happen' Nobody."
"Can we have a baby?" I bite my lips as soon as the words left my lips. It was out of the blue and completely unrelated to the topic.
"Are you pregnant?" He smiled a little and glanced towards my stomach.
"No...but I'm thirty-six. And I want a family."
"Not yet... sometime. I just don't want to risk anything." His gaze softened. "I would love to have a family with you. There's nobody I rather would.. but not yet. I'm not ready."
"But I am! Besides, you'll have nine months to be ready. I just...if I wait to long, eventually I won't get to have one." I wanted a family. I had never brought it up, but now... it just felt like we should. Like we where ready. I set myself on fire. That was accidentally. It was behind us. I just... I sighed. I saw Trevor nervous. He was adorable when he was nervous.
"We can have a baby."
"You don't want one."
"I'd love him or her, though. I want you to be happy. If a baby makes you happy, we can have a baby."
"No. No... just. I'm going to sleep." I stood up, brushing off the sand. Any thoughts of a romantic night where off. Trevor just wanted to protect his family... the family I wanted to grow. What would it take to make him ready?
Sunday, December 8, 2013
5.6 Part One: Love too Much to Lose
"I can't believe we've been dating for seven years." Alani said, as she browsed through the racks at the consignment store. We recently built an attic after Alani moved in with me and she wanted to create curtains for the windows. The consignment store had a fifty percent off sale all vintage dresses, so here we where.
"I know. It's crazy. But you know what's crazier?"
"What? Trevor what are you doing?"
"It's crazy that you're this amazing and smart and beautiful. It's crazy every man isn't in love with you."
"That's so sweet. But really. The floor's dirty."
"It's crazy I waited seven years to do this."
"Do what?"
"I'm a crazy person. But there's one thing I think is crazier than me. Me not staying with you for the rest of my life. Because I love you too much to lose you. And since you're so amazing, it's crazy that you're with an idiot like me. So I decided I'd do this. Maybe I'm not crazy. Maybe you think I'm so far past crazy I'm insane. Either way, I know one thing. I love you. I want to spend the rest of my life with you. I couldn't wait anymore. Alani Shepherd, make me the happiest crazy man on Earth and marry me. Please."
"Trevor. You're insane. And I love you."
"Am I insane because I'm proposing?"
"No, you're insane because you're marrying me."
"Is that a yes?"
"Defiantly."
"I love you." I had said it so much today, but it was so true. Alani was who I wanted to spend the rest of my life with.
One year later...
It was the happiest day of my life. Alani's whole extended family, her sister's family and their husband's family, showed up. Even my brother's made an appearance. Happy begins with Alani.
NOTE: I'm running out of ideas for this romantic wedding stuff. So yeah. Any ideas on how to make it special? I've done song and everything, but...this is a very short chapter, hence the part one. Part two is coming soon. Thanks for reading!
"I know. It's crazy. But you know what's crazier?"
"What? Trevor what are you doing?"
"It's crazy that you're this amazing and smart and beautiful. It's crazy every man isn't in love with you."
"That's so sweet. But really. The floor's dirty."
"It's crazy I waited seven years to do this."
"Do what?"
"I'm a crazy person. But there's one thing I think is crazier than me. Me not staying with you for the rest of my life. Because I love you too much to lose you. And since you're so amazing, it's crazy that you're with an idiot like me. So I decided I'd do this. Maybe I'm not crazy. Maybe you think I'm so far past crazy I'm insane. Either way, I know one thing. I love you. I want to spend the rest of my life with you. I couldn't wait anymore. Alani Shepherd, make me the happiest crazy man on Earth and marry me. Please."
"Trevor. You're insane. And I love you."
"Am I insane because I'm proposing?"
"No, you're insane because you're marrying me."
"Is that a yes?"
"Defiantly."
"I love you." I had said it so much today, but it was so true. Alani was who I wanted to spend the rest of my life with.
One year later...
It was the happiest day of my life. Alani's whole extended family, her sister's family and their husband's family, showed up. Even my brother's made an appearance. Happy begins with Alani.
NOTE: I'm running out of ideas for this romantic wedding stuff. So yeah. Any ideas on how to make it special? I've done song and everything, but...this is a very short chapter, hence the part one. Part two is coming soon. Thanks for reading!
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